Been waiting for help for months now

https://lemmy.world/post/3434691

Been waiting for help for months now - Lemmy.world

“If you feel suicidal, there’s always help! Just talk to (x) or contact (y) organization!” Except, this couldn’t be further from the truth. When you tell people around you you aren’t well and need help, they scoff at you and talk about their own problems which are always much worse. If you finally do bite the bullet and go to your GP and ask for help, they tell you that there’s a waiting list of 5 months. Except if you’re actively suicidal - which I fight against every day - then you can get help immediately. But I don’t want to take the place of someone who needs it more than me, so I don’t pretend to be worse off than I am. I don’t even know where I’m going with this. I just needed to rant. No replies needed, I’m sure this post is just another drop in an entire ocean, and there’s nothing special about me that entitles me to more or better help than the next fool in line. God damn, how I hate this entire society. We’re currently at the most risk of global nuclear war since the cold war, and I honestly can’t bring myself to give a fuck. A part of me hopes Putin pushes that button, and with that action, take away any and all agency I have left - for I only misuse it anyway.

Hello. I’ve been suicidal ish for about 15 years. Mental health and such nonsense is not even a thing where I live.

But over these 15 years I’ve learned that being that way isn’t a constant. And there are a lot of external factors that can compound on your poor mental health.

I use this website to help me when I really feel like shit. I’ve found that being depressed generally keeps you from needing water and food. Which messes with your head more.

There’s also that time after you hangout with friends and are finally alone, for some reason your brain chemistry just crashes. I just hug a pillow and try to sleep through this. I’ve found no way of stopping that shit train.

It’s important to note that the first thing depression does is make you self-isolate. Avoid that at all costs. Sometimes social things don’t click and that hurts too, but isolation will dig you a hole that you cannot climb out of.

If you are a student in a first world country, getting therapy should be cheaper and easier.

Other general things like eating better and going to the gym will definitely help, but you will struggle to maintain any form of consistency because you have little energy in your head. But sporadic once-a-month gym sessions are far better than nothing. And do not put yourself down for not maintaining consistency. Especially when you see others doing it. They probably don’t have the same problems that you do.

This got a bit rambly, and is mostly my personal experience, but I hope it helps you at least a little.

You feel like shit.