Late2ThePartyEnd of an era: Zoom tells employees to return to office for work
jubilationtcornponeI can’t think of a worse marketing strategy for a company that relies on remote work to remain relevant. This would be like if General Motors forced every employee within 50 miles of an assembly plant to ride a bike to work.
These are fun. For any other CEOs reading along, here’s your new policy/advertisement:
- Furniture Row could convert every employee workstation to standing only.
- Starbucks could require every staff member to go caffeine free.
- Underarmor could set a black tie dress code for all employees.
- Master lock could shut down their staff gym citing uncontrolled theft from lockers.
- Grayhound could ban employees from traveling together to events.
- General Mills could establish a rewards program for employees who participate in a daily morning fast until lunchtime.
- Atlassian and Salseforce could shift their internal help desks to in-person only with 100% paper records.
- Peterbilt could start an incentive program that reimburses staff for buying local.
I like the way you think.
Flying Squid-
Microsoft could require Macs for all employees.
-
Xfinity could only offer dialup at their offices.
-
Dairy Queen could only hire diabetics.
-
The cafeteria at Purdue Farms headquarters could be all-vegan.
-
Barnes and Noble staff must have a library card and check out books regularly.
-
Amazon delivery drivers must have their license suspended.
-
Bed, Bath and Beyond could require their floor staff to only come in if they haven’t showered.