Roni Rolle LaukkarinenAug 5, 2023

During my one year activity on the #Fediverse I've now seen at least four instance admins quitting from being an admin or shutting down their server. Half of these cases were admins being dickheads and the rest of them were mostly about users being dickheads leading admin getting burned out.

Both outcomes are unfortunate, but the latter makes me sad. Why do we have to harass and doxx an admin here for such pseudetical reasons like extensive open text search feature? I don't get humans sometimes.

I repeat: We are not free from toxicity on the Fediverse. Be kind. Make a chance.

#MastoAdmin #Fediverse #SocialMedia

Show threadRoni Rolle LaukkarinenAug 5, 2023

Btw, I've gotten really harsh criticism for just saying "Be kind"... that won't stop me from saying it. We can always be kind and I can say "be kind" out of kindness. Encouraging to kindness is not rudeness and I can't wrap my head around it why would it be anything else than focusing on the positive side of things.

There are always people who focus on negativity, pessimism and hate. Whatever hits me, I choose to smile. #Positivity #Kindness #Attitude

Show threadJanne KiviluotoAug 5, 2023
@rolle out of curiosity, what's been the argument for saying "be kind" to be rude?
Show threadRoni Rolle Laukkarinen
@janne There was a better term for it I can't recall correctly, but it is something to do with the notion that you can't tell others what to do or it's considered as condescending, making you look a better person etc... I wish I'd remember that conversation better so I could look for it.
Aug 5, 2023 at 2:42pmWeb
Show threadRoni Rolle LaukkarinenAug 5, 2023

@janne Oh yes got it now:

Terms:
- Tone policing
- Toxic positivity

The argument also focuses on entitlement. Like if you are not part of the harassed minority, you can't say "be kind" as it's understood as "don't be angry about the things you have suffered from" etc.

Show threadJanne KiviluotoAug 5, 2023

@rolle I would understand (and agree with) this if there would be context, ie. "be kind" would be a patronizing reply to someone.

Generic "be kind" is hard to find tone policing or toxic positivity in my opinion. But then again, I honestly think kindness is our superpower...