I try doing what I can for the snowcrows discord regarding willbender but it feels so often like I'm a punchline and that the work/care I give to the spec is just kind of laughed at.

I've been really going through it and it sucks feeling 1) unwanted (not at snowcrows, just kind of broadly with most of the people I've thought were friends) and 2) unappreciated. Like I dunno what I want out of the whole thing but it sucks feeling like I'm only ever putting this work in for me and nobody else gives a shit.
I'm kind of just going through it though, I've been really lonely and really hurting for a while (for like a week acutely, but more broadly for the past few years)

I dunno. I'm just kind of suffering silently for the most part and wanted to sort of lament about it to a degree. Sorry for the change of pace