By a bidet attachment for your toilet right now. It’s like $25 and you can install it in 30 minutes.

Wouldn’t you pay $25 to never have to wipe your ass again? Go do it.

I visited Japan and tried it there several times after hearing people rave about it online. I hated it every time and gave up at some point and went back to my old ways.

You still have to wipe your ass to dry it off, and I’d it got all the poo is questionable, but it’s wet, and you have toilet paper which is the worst at dealing with water. It just falls apart. Not to mention the association I have with a wet ass and bad diarrhea, which isn’t great. All around a bad experience. 0/10, would not recommend.

I rinse with water while aiding with my hand to make sure it’s all clean and then use a dedicated towel to wipe it dry. I guess it’s slightly more inconvenient than just wiping but I’ve been doing this for well over 10 years and don’t really think about it.