& very many words have been put onto the internet with the express purpose of explaining exactly why ultima VIII is a very, very bad video game—& also, precisely how it happened that a video game so bad was even allowed to be made.

The only actual objectively bad thing, though, is really just that jumping mechanic; almost all other criticism was/is, more generally, the variously unmet expectations from (what had been) the pre-establish player base.

& those expectations were probably not unwarranted?

but nevertheless, if you were, let's say, a v edgy & somewhat isolated child who had almost narily ever played a video game on personal computer & then you were met with the intro video for ultima VIII? Well, it was all over for you & you were almost certainly locked into having An Unpopular Opinion About A Video Game for the rest of your life.

#ultimaVIII #ultima8

anyway. thinking I might replay ultima VIII because in the year of our lord 2023 it is one of the few games that will run on macOS 10.15 Catalina or above.

this is both a joke & also not a joke

🚨 ScummVM lets you change keymappings 🚨

The Avatar can now jump using spacebar like a normal person

the beginning of the game really is just a rapid-shot system of delivery for the types of things an edgy kid in their early teens would find compelling: drug use, meta humor—of course the aforementioned giant, glowing red pentagram—& a somewhat graphic state sponsored execution in the form of a beheading, performed by a blonde woman wearing fetish gear.

Whether or not it was intentional (& it probably was not), I was, in fact, the target audience for this game.

one thing that never really appealed to me at the time, though, was the Avatar himself. Nowadays I am able to feel nostalgia toward this haplessly violent, yellow-haired man—but only because I’m already aware of everything that awaits those on whom his desperate & feverish gaze rests.

but this is the sort of thing that can only be acquired through the passage of time, if it is even ever to be acquired at all

I found it better to lower the subtitle speed in the game settings to “50” (an argument could be made for just dropping it to “0”) & to change movement to wasd; it’s like a completely different game! (not really but the controls are much better!)

&

I have named my Avatar, "Tommy Gunn”; a couple days ago I finished rewatching the first five rocky movies (with the idea that I might finally watch Rocky Balboa from the year 2006) & the Avatar literally just looks like Tommy Gunn so

I, II, V, IV & III

(those last two are lateral)

edit: for the best to worst rating if watching with a group of people:

reverse the list

I forgot to activate the recall pad before leaving Tenebrae & had to walk all the way back from the plateau; good thing I’ve got that jumping patch installed!

#ScummVM doesn’t run the game as flawlessly as #DOSbox. Sometimes the game crashes if a book is open for too long (so, just save before reading), there have been occasional draw issues, & there's been some minor npc weirdness; but being able to play the game while using a trackpad is worth the tradeoff atm

The catacombs have been really rough in ScummVM; the level’s not great to begin with (it’s catacombs! in a video game!) but despite my natural tendency to be goaded forward by any & all aggravation, the throwing puzzle in the middle of the pilgrimage might...actually be impossible to do in this engine.

rest assured, dear reader, that I have tried.

I could cheat my way through the door—the real aim here, past the throwing puzzle—but I…would honestly rather not?

I’m going to have to reassess my options here (but I have a sinking sensation that if I pick this game up again I'll be back to using a wireless mouse)

I'm already going into withdrawal; it was really nice having a game to command tab over to while working on whatever.

might just install sim city 2000 for the time being...

man they fuckin don’t make menus like this anymore do they

#WillTV #skeuomorphism

so, each numbered button plays a video of Will Wright talking briefly about Sim City 2000; I watched all four videos but listening to Will Wright speak about game design apparently sends me into a fugue state and I remember nothing except that there’s some off-brand-looking kaiju toy on the desk behind him in “4"

someone has kindly uploaded these to the Internet Archive:
https://archive.org/details/Will_Wright_Questions_Simcity_2000_Special_Edition

Sim City 2000 isn’t doing it for me.

Right now I need a video game where my in-game identity is defined primarily by what I do or choose not to (or accidentally!) kill, and—& this is key—will also run on macOS 10.15 Catalina or above.
Wireless mouse it’ll have to be, then—but I will not game at a desk or at a table I swear to god;

I’ll have to see how it works within the restricted margins of my lap desk;

but the idea of having to use a gaming peripheral fills me with immeasurable sadness