They've only been the most popular instance for like 3 days and the mods there are already power tripping.

Unfortunately, "Defederating" is the same as "Banning yourself from everybody else", so I trust that people will vote with their (virtual) feet and move to instances with a more diverse set of federations.

They are not power tripping, if you've read their posts you'd know that they have a very concrete view of the story of community they want to build and unfortunately their manpower and moderation tools just don't allow them to stick to it while staying federated with rapidly growing communities.
Which is why I'll say it again and again, the fediverse might've been the wrong choice for building a community like they want
They only defederated temporarily from two instances. BeeHaw users still have access to the majority of other instances, including kbin. Not to mention they're already working on a way to refederate with lemmy.world and sh.itjust.works. Go on their page, they've been nothing but transparent and open to suggestion. This "drama" is pointless
I know that, my point is that they don't have the tools do do anything other than defederation right now.
If any users from other instances than those two act in the same way and they happen to be from other big instances, they'd have to defederate those too, because they have no other tools available.
And they knew they won't have other tools availalbe when they created their instance, so they should've created such a platform in a place where they actualy had the tools to run it like they want.
I disagree. The advantage of the Fediverse is finding people who wanna cultivate a similar internet experience as you. I can still comment on Beehaw because I'm on a small well-moderated platform.
And had you been on an instance that was defederated youd have to mak another account to acces their community, just like a forum, which I exaplained in the other post would be the better choice becasue it doesn't make sense to have that kind of manual approval registration system when users can just join another instance or even create an instance for their own and then post what they want on beehaw