Iβd made it back into the kitchen, this time a fresh pot of coffee had been put on and I was looked in the freezer as to what I could cook everyone for breakfast in a few hours.
Finding a fresh loaf of bread, I set the oven on to bake it, knowing the rest would be easy. Ma has some rolled oats soaking, bacon and eggs. Some muffins. It wouldnβt be a bad start at all.
When the texts came in, I had to lean on the counter to read them, hearing his low voice in -
my mind as the words registers. What could I say to that? He felt like he wasnβt where he should be? But he had to be there. #Quil and #Bear needed him. He wanted to make sure I slept. We both knew that wouldnβt happen, not here, not tonight. Not while I still felt like I failed to be there when Ma needed me.
I stood watching the screen, trying to find the words for all that I was feeling. But I couldnβt. I wished sometimes that I could put all that was in -
my head into letters and words. But that wasnβt who I was or would ever be.
[ππ πππβπ πππ ππ’π ππ π ππππ π π π πππ ππ. πππππππππ. ππ πππ ππππππ π ππππ π π πππ. πππ πππ ππππππ π ππππ π’ππ πππ. π°ππ πΈ πππ ππ ππ πππππππ π’ππ ππππ π’πππ πππ ππ ππ ππππ πππππ.]
I didnβt say anything about him wanted to see me at peace. Because what would that even look like?
@HotHeadSheWolf
With my headphones in and music playing I read her reply and smiled.
[πΈ ππππ , πππ πππππππππ ππππ ππππ ππ πππππ. π±ππ πΈ ππππ ππππ πΌππ ππ ππ ππππ ππ πππ πππππ ππππππππ’ ππ. πΈ'π ππππ ππππππππ πππππ π’ππ... πΈ ππππ ππππ π’ππ'ππ πππππππ π’πππππππ ππ πππππ πππ ππ ππππ. πππππ'π πππππππ π ππππ π πππ π ππππππ ππ ππ πππππ πππ’ πππ ππππ π’ππ ππππ ππππππ ππ πππππ? π½ππ ππππ πΈ'π ππππππππππ π’ππ ππππ ππ ππ ππππ ππππππ... ππππ ππππ πΈ π ππππ ππππ ππ πππ’ πππ ππ πππ ππππππ π’ππ ππ.]
I closed my eyes, leaving >
Sipping on the cup of coffee in my hand I shook my head. I knew what he had been trying to tell me. What he had openly told me. That he was here for me, that he wanted to be in the same room as me. And it was something new. That he would want that? No. But that I could see him sat across the kitchen table from me right now. Yes.
And that realisation wasβ¦.
βSis? Did you sleep at all?β #Seth came out of the living room, -
with his heavy feet padding on the wooden floor. He made a point to walk in Maβs house with heavy footing so that she could hear him coming. βWhy are you cooking breakfast. You know after the day we all had yesterday there is no way the moms will be up at the crack of dawn.β
I pocketed my phone before turning to look at him stood in the door. βJust wanted something to do.β I told him as he came to still beside me, taking my cup of coffee and drinking from it. -
βI know you wonβt believe me. But you need to sleep too. come on.β Setting the cup down he curled his fingers around mine standing and making me follow him to the couch. βYou sleep, I will take the next watch. I will give them their meds when they wake up and I will keep my ears on them at all times.β
Setting me down, he pulled the throw over my legs and kissed my forehead. βPlease. Sleep.β
Giving his hand a squeeze, I turned to free my -
hair from under myself before curling my legs to fit on Maβs couch. Thinking of Embryβs words.
βπΈ'π ππππππππππ π’ππ ππππ ππ ππ ππππ ππππππ... ππππ ππππ πΈ π ππππ ππππ ππ πππ’ πππ ππ πππ ππππππ π’ππ ππ.β
Taking my phone out I sent a quick shot message hoping he will see it in the morning after he had slept.
[πΈπ ππππ’ π’ππ ππππ π πππ ππππππ π’ππ πππππ ππ’ πππ ππππ ππ ππ.]
@HotHeadSheWolf
My alarm blared... well... not really because my phone was permanently on vibrate. But my head ached from the lack of sleep, so the buzzing was the most irritating noise I had ever heard right now.
My phone was still next to me, I lifted it and cancelled the alarm. Snooze was never something I needed, it was one of those things that people found shocking about me... they assumed my laid-back approach to life meant I liked to stay in bed. But I was a morning person.
I read >
@HotHeadSheWolf
< her text and smiled. Because I could imagine... If it was even half of what she did for me? Well... that would be something for sure.
I knew it was true, and knew that it wasn't easy for her to say even that much. I knew she could never ask me to be there for her... but maybe that was exactly why the ancestor steered our paths this way. I never needed to be asked or invited, I was really good at just showing up anyway.
[πΈ ππππ π’ππ π ππ'π ππ ππππππππ ππ π’πππ πππππ πππππππ... >
@HotHeadSheWolf
< πππ πππ’ππ π’ππ ππππππ ππππ ππππ... πππ’ ππππππ πππππππππ? ππππ π πππ, πππ ππππ π ππππ ππ... πππ’ππ π πππ.]
My patrol would be finished at about that time and I could spend a few hours with her if she could ta herself away... but this was Leah. The chances of her putting her needs first were slim. But I would just keep trying.
I got up and headed out to the main room of the house... it was only when I saw #Quil, up and dressed that I realised the house smelled of coffee and >
< bacon.
I looked around the room... "What the hell? What's wrong? Why are you up?" It was normally my waking him up... but breakfast was a bowl of cereal... not... I followed the smell. It was making my stomach growl.
'Littlesea dropped off breakfast... he figured we all had a day yesterday.' #Quil stuffed his face with a sausage. 'Damn that pup can cook!'
I laughed. It was true. But was a greasy fry-up... not his usual healthy version. "He's a great kid... I never even >
@HotHeadSheWolf
< heard his truck."
'He walked up from down the road, he didn't want to walk you up because you had been working.' #Quil explained.
"Of course he did." I laughed and made myself a plate from the food wrapped in tin foil on the counter.
The sound of the truck wasnβt new to my ear. I knew that sound anywhere. #TheKid was walking towards the front of the house before the wheel had turned into Maβs drive way.
βDid I wake you?β the soft voice whispered.
βNo, not at all. I was just in the shower.β The scent of soup was in the air. Not that #TheKid would lie.
-
βGood, I made you all some breakfast. I wanted to make sure you all had some down time this morning.
#TheKid laughed. βSis made breakfast at the crack of dawn. But you know we will never say no to your food Pup. Come on in.β
I sat up on the couch, pulling my hair up into a messy bun before standing and stretching my body out.
-
βGood morning, Leah, did you sleep at all?β #Collin smiled from the living room door.
βIs that your way of saying I look bad?β I asked narrowing my eyes at him.
βUhmβ¦ noβ¦ nβ¦ Noβ¦ not at allβ¦β his face and ears were turning red.
βSo, now you are checking me out while you are standing in my Maβs house?β
-
βNO! NOβ¦ I promise youβ¦.β The pup moved from foot to foot pulling on the collar of his shirt.
βSis, would you stop messing with the pup. He brought us all food.β #Seth placed a protective arm around the pups shoulder and squeezed him. βSheβs always in a bad mood when she doesnβt sleep. Itβs why I put her to sleep.β
-
The pupβs eyes moved from my brother and then to me and back again. βI should go.β
βNo.. No, you shouldnβt. get your arse in the kitchen and eat some breakfast with us, and then I promised you, and Fuller that you could see Ma today.β Looking out at the street and the other Pup made his way up the path. βSpeaking of.β
Letting the boys set up breakfast I went to brush my teeth and clean up, seeing the missed text from this morning from -
Embry. I knew he was right, but I also knew myself. And I wasnβt going to be able to leave Ma, not while she was hurting.
[πΈ πππβπ ππππ ππππππππ πΈ ππππ ππ πππππ ππ ππππ. πΈ ππππ πΈ ππππππ, πππ πΈ ππππ πππππ πππ ππππ ππππ.]
@HotHeadSheWolf
#Quil and I ate, and I had the mid-morning run. For #Quil, it was time with his imprint and I would probably go to see Mom for a while before I spent a little with Bear too... before she had to go home.
I waited for #Quil to go to the bathroom before I took out my phone and smiled at my phone.
[πΈ ππππππππππ. πΎππ πππ‘π πππ πΈ'π πππππ... ππ π’ππ πππ, ππ ππ π’ππ ππππππ π’πππ ππππ. πΆπππ πΌππ π ππππ ππππ ππ π πππ πππ π ππππ ππ. π°ππ ππππ πππ πππ ππππππππ ππ πππ.]
I felt the need for a >
@HotHeadSheWolf
< Shower... but i didn;t see the point. would just grab one at Jake's after my patrol and save myself a trip home.
I finished eating and washed the dishes. by the time #Quil was done in the shower, we made short work of tidying up and putting the leftover food in the fridge. There was enough left for both of us to get a decent dinner. That young pup always planned ahead.
"I'll tell Mom and Sue you said hello." I told #Quil before we got into separate vehicles.
'You >
@HotHeadSheWolf
< know there's no way Claire will leave with seeing Sue and Momma T... tell them we'll drop by for a visit. We won't stay long so they can get their rest.'
I just smiled and promised I would before I pulled out.
The Momβs both awoke to a house full of worried people. I helped Ma to shower and change before #TheKidd carried her down the stairs. βItβs my arm not my feet that is damaged.β Ma said still not quite herself yet.
βI donβt care, Iβm carrying down and thatβs that.β He laughed.
Then came a soft laughter of #MsC and her giggles. βPut me down young man.β -
Someone had taken a hold of her too?
βNope, you are both being carried like the goodness of the Rez.β #Brady was following the lead of #TheKid.
βYouβre listening to whatβs happening inside.β #Sam was beside me holding the door of the shed open. While I checked over everything that was in there. All the tools were backed away safely, and it was clean in here, however still Ma had injured herself.
-
βI like to keep an ear out.β #Sam stepping in to grab some clippers and move them to their rightful place.
βYeah, I know. But no sleep, thinking itβs all on your shoulders, not asking for help. Leah itβs all going to come to a head.β Turning my head as my hands reset my Daβs tool box.
βAnd yet here you all are. At the hospital, now, so do I need to ask for help?β -
His wife could be seen from the kitchen window, the sound of laughter coming from the house that had too many people in there which was why I made myself useful out here.
βAnd youβre out here hiding from them all.β #Sam finished off.
βI donβt hide. Justβ¦β he shook his head as I spoke.
-
βSure, sure. You came out here to investigate, how Sue was hurt, and how it can never happen again. Things happen Leah, we canβt watch over them all the time.β There was some truth in his words, I knew it. But some part of me still couldnβt let go. βCome on, Emily brought some food with her. And the Pup did well with the food he brought too. We should show them some love by eating it.β
I threw a car wash sponge at his head. -
βHey, I know you can eat too.β of course he caught it.
βHow about you get your arse in the kitchen and let you wife sit down.β Snapping my teeth at him that just made him laugh.
βHave you forgotten Iβm banned from ever going close to her or anyoneβs kitchen?β He was laughing.
βStop blowing up the toasters and they will let you back in.β
βLeah, Sam. Come in lunch is ready.β Emily opened the door and called out. -
We both looked to the house, knowing that Emily had only done that because #MsC was there.
#Sam rushed off inside giving me a moment of alone time. Stepping back my eyes evaluated the changed Iβd made in here. Bringing tools Ma was likely to come looking for lower and to the front, meaning she wouldnβt have to go hunting.
When I finally read the message Embry sent I closed my eyes and rubbed my forehead, making my way inside. -
I watched the people inside trying to make space and still over taking the kitchen. It was an extended family that was all here to help look out for my Ma.
Walking around Emily and Sam, I went to wash my hands before Kissing Ma and then MsC on the head and sitting down to my bowl of soup and grilled cheese. -
βYour son has been checking in all night. He thinks Iβd have you out all night dancing by the way he has been acting.β
βHe is a good boy.β She spoke smiling. βAnd he knows you would take good care of me.β Squeezing my arm.
βSpeaking of.β #Emily held out two bags making my frown. βYou and Seth need to go home, we have the day shift covered.β I shook my head. βLeah, trust in us.β she added giving Seth his bag. -
βTake your sister with you. I will call if anything changes of if we need you. But as much as I know you will say you donβt need to sleep. You do.β
βWhen did you become so forceful?β I asked my cousin.
βThe day she gave birth.β #Sam replied earning himself a slap from his wife. βHey! You know itβs true beautiful. He kissed his cheek and then went to sit beside #MsC.
#MsC watched every moment between us as she was taking it all in, her hand reached out and she stroked-
#Samβs cheek like a mother. βYou are so luck to have such a beautiful wife who loves you so much. Make sure you never take a moment with her for granted.β She smiled that warm smile that the Calls kept for those they cared for.
βI promise Mama T, I will never do that. Ever.β He kissed her forehead placing an arm around her shoulder to keep her close. He had noticed the same shiver that I had, and he knew too that #TiffenyCall did like to be βhandledβ due to her illness.
-
βTime to got Leah.β #Emily told me. βI have an over night bag and #Seth has remade his bed for me. Iβll be here.β Because she knew that I would say that she should be taking it easy and resting too. βThe ladies and I will be going up for a nap soon anyway, and then we have some shop talk to do.β Winking at the two Moms who nodded their heads in unison.
βWhy do I feel like itβs a conspiracy going on here?β I asked closing my arms looking between then all.
-
In the end it was Ma and #MsC who had told us to go rest, and not to worry. I knew MsC was here to help her friend and sister. But it didnβt feel right to leave them. And in that moment, I understood now what Embry had been feeling last night. Feeling like you are in the wrong placeβ¦ it was a strange sentiment.
@HotHeadSheWolf
< laughed and showed #Billy.
βWowβ¦ They are really hunkering down over there.β He chuckled.
I replied saying:
[ππππ π΅πππππ ππ ππππ ππππππππ π πππ ππ’ ππππππ!]
A reply from another pup not at the Clearwater house shot in.
[π·π πππ ππ’π πππ π πππππ πππ πππππ π ππππ! π±πππππ π ππππ πππ π²πππ!]
The exhaustion I was feeling left my body when I made it to the small grove behind the Black's house. My wolf lurched into being and brought with him an abundance of energy. As soon as the >
@HotHeadSheWolf
< other's minds linked with mine that were asking what was happening and how #Sue as I blocked out the conversation I had with Leah that night by showing them all the image of the moms getting the royal treatment.
"They're okay, Sue has recovery ahead of her but she'll be well looked after." I assured them all, and I got them all back on track. We had a job to do and #Sue would not be impressed if we didn't do it to the best of our abilities.
Today that was the only motivator >
@HotHeadSheWolf
< I needed to get them on track today.
After my run, I showered at Billy's place, and read through the conversation that had occurred in the group chat in my absence. Laughing at the back and fourth banter about who I was going to thump for flirting with my mother.
Instead of replying to them, I text Leah.
[π΅πππππππ ππ’ πππ... ππ πππππ’πππ πππππ ππ π’πππ πΌππ'π πππππ?]
Standing under the water I closed my eyes. Visions of my Ma in the hospital flashed on a loop. The scent of her blood reminded in my nose and the way I found her made my heart stop. βI should have been there.β I told myself.
Keeping my hands flat pushed against the wall was the only way to keep the younger Leah from breaking out.
βNo, you need to understand that accidents happen. You where there when you were meant to be.β -
My wolf spoke to me softly, trying to talk me down from the ledge Iβd been climbing onto.
By the time I was done, with a towel wrapped around my steaming body, another in my hairs drying my hair. I stepped out of the bathroom, walking my way back into my bedroom. The sound of my phone going off brought me to the phone charging on the side.
I hadnβt replied to his last text, knowing he would be on his run and his phone wouldnβt have been with him.
-
[π·ππ π ππ πππ πππ? π³π ππππ’ ππππ ππ πππ πππππ? πΈ πππ ππππ πππ πππ‘π πππ. π½π, ππ πππ ππ πππππ. π΄ππππ’ ππππππ πππππ’πππ πππ. πππ π πππππ πππ ππππ ππ ππππ.]
Hitting send, I went to stand before my closet. Thinking, maybe I should head out for a run? The others had picked up my slake, and I hated it..
I stole a razor from under the sink and shavedβ¦ I notice that my hair was at that awkward length where I either needed to cut it or deal with it falling into my face for another few weeks. I swept it back off of my face while it was wet and pretended as if it might just stay there after it dried. It wasnβt going to happen.
I read Leah's message and shook my head. βOf course she did.β I chuckled to myself quietly. >
@HotHeadSheWolf
>
I had really wanted to see Mom before work today⦠but I still had an afternoon to kill before my shift. I could let the moms have a nap and see them later⦠I was sure they had to be exhausted.
[ππππ’'ππ ππ ππππ πππππ... ππππ? ππππ ππππ πππ πππππππ ππ ππππ π’ππ πππ πππ?]
I sent back⦠not really believing it. She had to have meant that she kicked everyone else out and not her too. I mean⦠#EmilyUley was a formidable woman, >
@HotHeadSheWolf
>
but would she really have talked Leah out of her motherβs house? Even if it was for her own good. I made my way out to the kitchen and poured myself a coffee.
βI thought you would be racing off to see youβre Mom.β Billy said from behind a copy of The Talking Raven.
βApparently, she has been sequestered away by #Emily.β I chuckled and took a sip. βIβll wait a while; Iβm sure Iβll get a chance to see her before my shift starts.β
>
@HotHeadSheWolf
< βYes, yesβ¦. Working late nights is no problem for the young and energetic.β Then he examined me. βAlthoughβ¦ you arenβt looking particularly energetic right now.β He added.
βI didnβt sleep greatβ¦ fretting about #Sue, She was still really pale last time I saw her.β I admitted, and it was trueβ¦ but Leah and Seth had been on my mind too.
βYou should have just stayed there last night. Sleeping on a floor is a better night's >
@HotHeadSheWolf
< rest than tossing and turning in a bed.β He folded one corner of the tribal publication.
βIβm not so sure Leah would have stood for thatβ¦ It was a miracle #Seth talked his way into staying.β I chuckled.
βAhβ¦ yes. Leahβ¦ I find with that oneβ¦ sometimes. Asking for permission isnβt nearly as effective as just doing what it is you feel you need to.β He smiled.
βWellβ¦ not all of us are her elders.β I smiled back
Rolling my eyes when his message flashed up onto the screen.
[π·πππ π’ππ πππππ ππ ππππππ π πππππ π ππππ? π°ππ ππ ππ π πππ πππ ππ ππ πππππππ ππ ππ π°ππππ π ππ ππ ππππππ πππ ππππ, πππ πππ πππ ππππ πππ ππππ πππππππππππ’ ππππππππππππ πππ? πΈ ππππ π΄π π πππ ππππ ππππ ππ πππ ππππ. π°ππ ππ ππ’ πππππππ πππ π πππ πππππ ππ πππππ ππππ πππππ π πππππ ππ πππππ ππ ππππ. πΈ π πππ ππ ππ. -π»]
Just how stubborn did he think I was exactly? Sure, I was hard headed and sure it was -
kind of killing me not hearing the beating heart of my Ma , however I could respect someoneβs need for space. And their need to feel like they are achieving something too. And both the moms where so alike in some ways. Ms T wanted to feel like she was helping, and I know E would be there to keep things in check.
I found myself standing in the kitchen as my mind worried over everything I need to do to pay back the time all the others have put in to -
pick up after the Kid and I. Both in the pack and with the bar. Turning in a full circle I ended up filling a glass of water to take over to the couch. Could I eat? Yeah of course, but I wasnβt feeling the pull towards cooking. So, grabbing a banana I ate it disgracing the peel before sitting now and hitting play on my phone. Something needed to calm the uncertainty I could feel building,
-
A small smirk escaped my lips when I heard the song the shuffle gods had picked for me.
βOf course.β
https://youtube.com/watch?v=1x1305Z1lTo
Lifting my feet up off the floor I shifted my butt, laying down outstretched on the couch, listening to the music, the words, with my eyes closed and my arm dawned over my eyes to close them with a little darkness.
@HotHeadSheWolf
I sipped my coffee and read her replyβ¦ onceβ¦ twiceβ¦ three times. βYou know Iβve found that no matter many times you read something the words never change.' #Billy raised his cup to me.
I smirked. "No... but our understanding of them can."
He gave me that look like I had exceeded his expectation and laughed. 'Touche, my boy. Touche.'
I took another big gulp of the coffee and then stood up pouring the end of the cup into the sink and and setting it on the side.
'So, now >
@HotHeadSheWolf
< you're in a rush?' #Billy chuckled. 'Where are you off to?'
"Somewhere else I don't have permission to be." I grinned at him. "Mind if I leave the Jeep here for a while?"
'You should... even my old ears can hear that old girl coming a mile away.' #Billy picked up his paper again.
"I'll see you tomorrow, Uncle." I called to him already heading down the hallway to the front door. I heard the floorboards squeak as he wheeled himself to the kitchen door.
'It's been a long >
@HotHeadSheWolf
< time since called me that, Embry.' He said with a small tremble in his voice. I knew why... but the second the word slipped out; I had felt a catch in my own throat.
"Far too long." I smiled back at him.
'Let's not leave it so long next time, shall we?' The chief nodded.
"You got it." I tried to hold back a smile.
'Get outta here will you... I'm a busy man.' He shooed me with his paper and I laughed. Head ing out and making my way where I wanted to be.
The walk from >
@HotHeadSheWolf
< here was a little longer, but with music in my years but really it was just five songs. I smiled, My mother often measured time in song lengths.
But there it was... five songs later and I was knocking on Leah Clearwater's door.
And instantly remembered I hadn't texted her back. "Damn it!" I laughed at myself and pulled out my phone to turn off my music.
I must have drifted off to sleep, not sure how long had passed when the spirits came to life and began to sing, they kissed my skin with the air with a scent ofβ¦.
βEmbry?β
His name slipped from my lips, as Brothers Osborneβs were singing Stay A Little Longer now. https://youtu.be/s7tdIWcRZZI
But it was the spirits I honed in on. They were talking about him and his scent hit my sleepily mind, making me wake up with a shock. -
Reaching out I checked my phone, there were no messages or missed calls on it.
I heard the sound of his footsteps, the whisper of his music. Making me Jump up from the couch, I was across the living room and up the small hallway to the door just as his knocked.
The door hadnβt even fully opened when I asked.
βWhat happened? Are the Momβs okay?β
Only them did I notice the smile on his lips. He was smiling? That had to mean they were fine, right?
My eyes moved past -
him to the street, but there was no jeep, no bike, no one else.
βWhatβs going on?β Asking with confusion in my eyes.
@HotHeadSheWolf
I smiled at the song I could hear from inside before they started towards the door. And the fact that she knew it was me from her living room.
"Everyone is fine, just how you left them. If something was wrong I wouldn't be coming to you without my jeep or my bike. I should have replied to your text and told you I was coming. I'm sorry."
I looked over my shoulder showing her there was no Jeep, no bike... just me.
"If just taking the advice of a wise man to ask for forgiveness >