Have been here about 3 weeks now, so am happy to share some information with new arrivals.

1. The T in Mastodon is silent to discourage the use of letters found in the word Twitter

2. That guy in the corner is Abe, he bites redheads and shouldn't be woken between 2pm and 9.15pm

3. The colour verdigris is not banned but is strongly discouraged

4. Question marks are now commas

5. Jokes must be exactly 173 characters long and/or in rhyming couplets

6. Fun is mandatory but rationed, for safety