every time i go to google to ask how old i am or look for some advice about feeling like i've accomplished nothing in my life, i see a bunch of people who are like
"aw man i only have 2 degrees and i'm not using my master's for anything, i'm just working as a clerk for the city and i'm already 25"
like, move aside chump
i have yet to make a living wage or hold down a job for two full years AND I'M TURNING 30
everyone's having babies and getting married and like, i feel like the odd one out all the time
like, folks reassure you that getting married is just a title thing that doesn't really mean much, but like
it does to me?
it's what it indicates, you know?
i could never have a kid. the partner i live with isn't even my boyfriend anymore, and he's signalled we're probably going to break up if he wants to date again, which makes me feel like a placeholder.
i can't imagine a future where i have a family, instead of being like, the one on the outside looking in. i miss paying bills and rent.
i dunno. i'm friggin touch starved and um, i feel like i've just been sleepwalking my way through life.
i feel like i'm the quirky attention-grabbing one in every group and it's weird, i dunno.
it's hard to describe exactly, it's like...people seem to like me more than they should, cause i come in small doses
Zoey Heatherhorns
lily with one l 🦌
Ceilidh