@Aleums some background: my friend's mom started dating this dude who's been leaving gross shit in her old room and not letting her visit for a while now

anyway, a year or two ago she got together w her ex and together they stored like an intense week's worth of cum in a jar to make him some lovely cum brownies. And like, I guess she used too much at first because it was causing some consistency problems (1/2)

@Aleums so she's done with the first batch, which comes out horribly lumpy, and the second batch is in the oven. she's just about to throw the first batch into the trash when her mom's bf comes bounding down the stairs

"What's that?" he asks
"Oh, I'm making some brownies but these ones came out bad so im throwing them away"

and i shit you not he grabs the whole thing and shouts "GOOD ENOUGH FOR CHRIS" before diving face first into these

@Aleums lumpy, lopsided, horrible cum brownies. he just goes to town on them while she watches eyes wide in horror.

"a-any comments?"

"They're so *rich*!"

by the next day all the batches of cum brownies were completely gone

@hundredsofdeadrats @Aleums reading this produced a very particular kind of sick slowly growing dread so good work
@IrinaIsha @Aleums tyhank you i had the same feeling when she told me about it