Dan@TheWildflowerist wow. Just wow. What the heck? Unreal. I have no words. We have faced some similar issues with my daughter who wears yoga pants. The issue isn’t the girls, it’s the boys and their idiot parents. My son is not an animal. He can control where he looks and what he thinks about. This pisses me off so much.
TheWildflowerist@danielmrose me too! I have sons. They are responsible for their actions. And truly I’m not sure it matters. My daughter could be wearing a paper sack and get the same reaction. A person has self control or they don’t. I don’t blame the donut for existing if I eat three... or four 😂😂😂. A panda shirt doesn’t cause “a boy to stumble” another phrase I hate.
Abigail@TheWildflowerist @danielmrose I remember when I "developed" my mom was super uncomfortable with it and ended up making me super uncomfortable with my body. She kind of tried to hide me with clothes, and now is like "why are you wearing such baggy clothes?" WELL MOM. Apparently the family agrees my boobs and butt are too big so I should lose weight. You are not this family so you are doing well. For the record, I think the fat is evenly distributed everywhere.
@abigail @danielmrose
😔 I’m sorry Abigail. I still wear loose clothes too as a result and a need to hide. My husband tells me to buy clothes that fit me better all the time instead of a size up but it just doesn’t feel right. I’m still working through a lot of that myself- I don’t want it for my kids.
😔 I’m sorry Abigail. I still wear loose clothes too as a result and a need to hide. My husband tells me to buy clothes that fit me better all the time instead of a size up but it just doesn’t feel right. I’m still working through a lot of that myself- I don’t want it for my kids.
@TheWildflowerist @danielmrose Which makes you a good mom! I suggest even if you don't like something about yourself you don't talk about it in front of your kids. I didn't know knees could "be fat" until my mom lamented hers and then I basically have never worn shorts since. Not only are my legs fat THE KNEES are fat. *sigh*
@abigail I have found skinny=great comments to be harmful also. As a child I was a rail so when I started developing it looked obscene no matter what I wore. I learned to hide it. Then when I was looking at remarriage my now husband tried to encourage me not to hide- that my body was beautiful and he was shocked after 6 kids how skinny I was. He meant it nicely but it tricks me that I only have value if Im skinny. So I’m careful not to say she is beautiful and skinny too.
@TheWildflowerist You're killing it
@abigail
My rule of thumb- no fat comments, no skinny comments. Also no skin comments about myself audibly. That’s where my self esteem gets me- I’ve had seven kids, my stomach skin shows it. I try not to cringe so my kids don’t learn that.
My rule of thumb- no fat comments, no skinny comments. Also no skin comments about myself audibly. That’s where my self esteem gets me- I’ve had seven kids, my stomach skin shows it. I try not to cringe so my kids don’t learn that.
@TheWildflowerist Yeah my mom talks about that too. She's tiny, so I've been bigger than her since I was like 12. Her heaviest weight is like my ideal weight unless I put on more muscle. And not gonna lie, part of why I don't to be pregnant is I've never worn a bikini and I want to someday, and I'm too timid to do it as is so I doubt childbirth will help. However, when I'm like 70 I'm going to wear whatever the hell crazy stuff I want.
@abigail @TheWildflowerist y’all, thanks for this thread.
These are my two kids. I’m trying hard to raise my son to see women and not just use them for their bodies. I’m trying to raise my daughter to be strong and confident.
So far so good. Lots to go though...
@abigail wear it now! ✨
@TheWildflowerist I don't want to wear crazy clothes yet, I'm anticipating my future self. I just dye my hair now.
brandice