Sam the OctopusOnce upon a time, there were three kingdoms, all bordering on the same lake. For centuries, these kingdoms had fought over an island in the middle of that lake. One day, they decided to have it out, once and for all.
cincodenadaThe first kingdom was quite rich, and sent an army of 25 knights, each with three squires. The night before the battle, the knights jousted and cavorted as their squires polished armor, cooked food, and sharpened weapons. The second kingdom was not so wealthy, and sent only 10 knights, each with 2 squires. The night before the battle, the knights cavorted and sharpened their weapons as the squires polished armor and prepared dinner.
The third kingdom was very poor, and only sent one elderly knight with his sole squire. The night before the battle, the knight sharpened his weapon, while the squire, using a looped rope, slung a pot high over the fire to cook while he prepared the knight's armor.
The next day, the battle began. All the knights of the first two kingdoms had cavorted a bit too much (one should never cavort while sharpening weapons and jousting) and could not fight. The squire of the third kingdom could not rouse the elderly knight in time for combat. So, in the absence of the knights, the squires fought.
The battle raged well into the late hours, but when the dust finally settled, a solitary figure limped from the carnage. The lone squire from the third kingdom dragged himself away, beaten, bloodied, but victorious.
And it just goes to prove, the squire of the high pot and noose is equal to the sum of the squires of the other two sides.
BADUM TSH
Ellie@troubleMoney Excellent.
lizard appreciator@troubleMoney oghhh gooodsddddhsgagrkrnsbsld
Sydney “The Word” Falk 
I can visit the ocean ANY damn time, don't test me buddy :P
(am kidding octofren, but you know this)
Sam The Octopus
The Ocean
Water, -00001
@sydneyfalk it's actually Sam the Octopus, down where it's better, down where it's wetter, under the sea
ah, so I should address thusly:
Sam The Octopus
Down Where It's Better
Down Where It's Wetter
Under The Sea, -00001
@troubleMoney @[email protected] This is the BEST, I am so happy to have a replacement for the similar old chestnut that is, uh, not terribly respectful of Native American culture. Thank you, it's terrible, I love it 😄