Was I able to find documentation of the commands? Yes, doing v4l2-ctl --help-vidcap, which is documented in the man page. That probably should have just been another man page.
Was I able to change the pixelformat on my camera to MJPG? Yes, by doing v4l2-ctl -d /dev/video0 --set-fmt-video=pixelformat=MJPG.
Does this make a difference when I do mpv /dev/video0 to check the video output? Nope! It gets set back to YUYV raw video at 5fps.
So I do actually need to figure out how to set the correct format in ffmpeg or whatever I use to stream to the loopback device?