57 year old man on facebook: Croc's should be called sport utility sandals, ha ha ha!
Earth's atmosphere: 410 ppm CO₂ and rising

overheard "He's like the GG Allin of SEO in the multi-level marketing field"

cancel culture is cancelled

(Playing minesweeper and entering the contents of each square into a giant spreadsheet) "I am a power user"

The year is 2020. The Colorado River is dry and the southwest is a desert. California has seceded and New York has been on fire for 2 years. Trump, on the campaign trail, is somehow convinced that Italian people say "Bingo Bango" and insists on shoehorning it into every sentence.

.

Web 3.0 is when a website makes the font on their page 3 times as big

it's saturday night, the weekend's weekend.
time to swallow a handful of melatonin and fall asleep in the fridge

"Father will be most displeased"