NickInKalamata

@nickinkalamata
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3 Following
23 Posts
Raised in Athens on strong coffee and mysterious recipes, 30 years in the U.S. taught me stories and irony. I write about life’s absurdities, Greek sun, laughter, and the little moments that make it unforgettable.
If you’ve lived in Greece long enough, you’ve heard of the fakelaki.
If you’ve really lived in Greece, you’ve probably delivered one.
And if you haven’t… you’ve definitely waited longer because of it.
👉 New Substack (no envelope required)
https://open.substack.com/pub/mybigfatfunnylife/p/greeces-little-envelope-with-big?r=vixu4&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true
Greece’s Little Envelope with Big Secrets

The curious life and afterlife of the fakelaki

My Big Fat Funny Life
In Greece, coffee delivery isn’t convenience — it’s culture.
Free machines can’t compete with ritual, foam ratios, and the barista who knows your soul.
☕️ Uber Eats? Cute. Greece Has Freddo Teleportation.
https://open.substack.com/pub/mybigfatfunnylife/p/uber-coffee-why-greeks-dont-need?utm_campaign=post-expanded-share&utm_medium=web
Uber Eats? Cute. Greece Has Freddo Teleportation.

In America you order tacos at midnight. In Greece, you order freddo cappuccino at 2 a.m.—even if the coffee machine is free and five steps away.

My Big Fat Funny Life
If you think you know Greece, think again.
The real story isn’t in the ruins or the sunsets — it’s in the people who quietly protect them.
New story up now. 🇬🇷
https://mybigfatfunnylife.substack.com/p/the-quiet-guardians-of-greece?r=vixu4
The Quiet Guardians of Greece

The souls who keep a country standing while the rest of us are busy taking pictures of,,, Greece

My Big Fat Funny Life
Kalimera from Kalamata!
One flight. One missing bag. One Russian suitcase scandal. And one Greek tax ID later… I finally got online.
https://mybigfatfunnylife.substack.com/p/doing-business-in-greece-a-24-hour?r=vixu4
You think Greece is slow now? Wait!

Doing Business in Greece? A 24-Hour Odyssey. Spoiler: WiFi didn’t save anyone.

My Big Fat Funny Life

I thought I wrote Important Work™.
Substack said “Adorable. Now, do something stupid.”
Spoiler: I did.
Read more and watch my downfall...

https://mybigfatfunnylife.substack.com/p/a-deep-dive-into-my-analytics-which?r=vixu4

Our Analytics Look Like WebMD Took Over Substack.

A scientific study conducted using our Substack stats by one confused Greek man

My Big Fat Funny Life
It’s St. Nikolaos Day.
Meaning: I get to do whatever I want, eat whatever I want, and overshare whatever I want.
If this post makes you laugh, perfect.
If not, St. Nikolaos will be accepting complaints from 9:00–9:01 AM.
🎁 Free diples for my Substack subscribers.
Click the link and take your honey-coated blessing.
https://open.substack.com/pub/mybigfatfunnylife/p/four-nikos-one-building-and-a-mountain?r=vixu4&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true
Four Nikos, One Building, and a Mountain of Diples

A true story of neighborly confusion, sugar overload, and Balkan-level diplomacy.

My Big Fat Funny Life
Which Greek island is “best”?
A subjective, chaotic exploration of 227 possibilities, distilled into one very opinionated guide.
🌊🌿
https://open.substack.com/pub/mybigfatfunnylife/p/greek-islands-which-one-is-best?r=vixu4&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true
Greek Islands: Which One Is Best?

A completely unhelpful guide you’ll still thank me for later.

My Big Fat Funny Life

Five Greek words.
One thousand possible meanings.
All decided by eyebrow angle.
Welcome to advanced Greek linguistics.
New post ⬇️
#MyBigFatFunnyLife #GreekHumor #SigaSiga #Greece

https://open.substack.com/pub/mybigfatfunnylife/p/five-greek-words-that-mean-a-zillion?r=vixu4&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true

Five Greek Words That Mean a Zillion Things

Because in Greece, vocabulary is optional. Eyebrows, however, are mandatory.

My Big Fat Funny Life
Ever tried reading a Greek electricity bill?
It’s like Greek mythology: dramatic, confusing, and full of hidden monsters.
I cracked the code so you don’t have to. ⚡️🇬🇷
https://open.substack.com/pub/mybigfatfunnylife/p/cracking-the-code-of-the-greek-electricity?r=vixu4&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true
Cracking the Code of the Greek Electricity Bill

How 444 kWh turned into a national fundraiser for garbage trucks, TV soaps, and wind turbines.

My Big Fat Funny Life
Greece does Black Friday.
Understanding optional.
Discounts mandatory.
Cultural adaptation at its finest.
Full post on Substack.
https://open.substack.com/pub/mybigfatfunnylife/p/its-black-friday-baby-wait-what?r=vixu4&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true
It's Black Friday baby! Wait, what???

Huge Sales, Zero Clue. Perfect.

My Big Fat Funny Life