Mastodawn

Widdershins Smith 🐘

@juglugs

2.8K Followers

600 Following

7.6K Posts

Unfluencer; Disappointing people since 1974; #UK #Opinionated; #ChiefArchitect; #Geek; #ExAlcoholic
90% of my jokes are recycled. So are yours.

I live in #Plymouth, UK.
I have lived in #NewTripoli, #USA, #Torpoint UK and #Halesowen, UK.

I think #ReligonPoisonsEverything

I love #comedy, #tech, #engineering, and #gadgets

I don't do Alt text - don't ask me to. If you want to do it for me, that's your prerogative. I don't print my posts in Braille either

Politics	#CentreLeft is where the heart is!
Religion	#AntiTheist
Linktree	https://linktr.ee/juglugs
Verify	https://juglugs.com

Widdershins Smith 🐘8h ago

Does anyone know how to change the clock on an African Grey parrot?

Widdershins Smith 🐘9h ago

I’m not so sure about this daylight savings time thing.
I give it six months.

Widdershins Smith 🐘9h ago

Ah yes, time for the biannual gaslighting of the cat, in which I slowly shift meals by 15 minutes at a time for two weeks in a ritual that is both mystifying and infuriating for him.

Widdershins Smith 🐘10h ago

Happy “my car clock is right again” day to all who celebrate

Widdershins Smith 🐘20h ago

The irony of all this is that the internet was created to save us time…

Widdershins Smith 🐘22h ago

Why lose an hour of sleep?

Can’t we all agree to spring forward mid-morning Monday?

Go from 9:59 am right to 11am… almost time for lunch.

Hard to imagine anyone would object.

Widdershins Smith 🐘1d ago

Kickin' ass and takin' names of anyone else who may want in on the ground floor of my new ass kicking enterprise.

Widdershins Smith 🐘2d ago

Have you ever felt fine during the end of the world as we know it?

Widdershins Smith 🐘5d ago

The mysterious writhing mass growing in the back of my vegetable crisper has apparently picked up some basic language skills.

I'll get round to cleaning it out when it knows how to conjugate a verb

Widdershins Smith 🐘5d ago

The Whore of Blahbylon 6d ago

You are being manipulated.

#Israel #IranWar #RussianWar #Despots #IsraelWar