TheNavyBear

42 Followers
29 Following
266 Posts
Just a bear on Mastodon...
PronounsHe/Him
LocationPNW, USA
Twitterhttps://twitter.com/thenavybear
I love being the resident big, loud, friendly gay bear in my office.
STOP FUCKING WITH THE CLOCKS!
I have ADHD time blindness!
I need clocks to know how many time it is
The narrative that individuals need to make “eco-friendly” choices really rankles me. It shouldn’t be a choice. The eco-destructive option should be legislated out of existence. And people shouldn’t be made to feel guilty about not doing something that the system makes hard for them to do.
Got some butchers twine for roasts and woof.group has broken me because my first thought was "does this count as bondage if I'm just tying up a pork roast?"

In 1999 to 2000 I was going through a very rough patch in my life. In the span of a few years, I'd gotten married, lost a parent, birthed a child, gotten divorced, changed careers, and relocated 3,000 miles away from everything and everyone I knew. What with the state of things, I didn't get to see Galaxy Quest when it was first released.

Finally, on a day I was feeling particularly low, and shortly before the movie left the theaters, I canceled work and took myself out to a midday matinée.

I was the *only* person in a vast theater, of a size that no one builds anymore, sitting and waiting for the lights to go down. At one point, I turned and peered up at the projectionist's booth. I saw a shadowy figure moving back and forth behind the window, bending and straightening. This was in the days before automated, digital films. The Phantom Menace had been released digitally in 1999, but the equipment to show such films was extremely expensive and most theaters hadn't converted yet; "projectionist" was still a real job.

While I was looking, the figure paused, strode to the window and peered back at me, then disappeared quickly.

I turned back around and continued to fidget and ponder the misfit pieces of my life.

At the top of the aisle behind me, the theater door swung open and banged loudly on the wall. The projectionist strode down the aisle toward me, a tall barrel-shaped man with a thick beard and glasses. My first thought was that the matinee was canceled due to low turnout, and I'd be getting a refund. Just as I'd resigned myself to that, the marching projectionist shouted out in a booming voice,

"WELCOME to your PRIVATE viewing oooooooof GALAXY QUEST!!!"

He stopped in front of my row, and I saw that he had an *armload* of STUFF. One by one, he began presenting each thing to me, and as the pile in his arms dwindled, the one in my lap grew.

"As our SPECIAL VIP Galaxy Quest GUEST today, YOU are entitled to..."

"- A commemorative t-shirt!"
"- A poster suitable for framing!"
"- A limited edition refrigerator magnet!"
"- A button to pin to your lapel!"

The list and the shwag went on. With every ridiculous item, I laughed harder and harder, until there were tears leaking out of the corners of my eyes.

Then he bowed and shouted, "WE HOPE YOU ENJOY THE SHOW!" and turned on his heel to march back up the aisle and out the exit door.

Alas, of all the shwag only the magnet has stood the test of time. But the humor and kindness of the unknown projectionist lives on.

#storytelling #GalaxyQuest

As seen on Twitter, I’ll put my stake in the ground here too: I will buy the jersey of the first #NHL player who tells the league to get fucked and uses #pride tape.

#HockeyIsForEveryone... and absolutely fuck anyone who wants otherwise.

biblically accurate goose
happy 30th anniversary to #Myst tomorrow!! i don't normally do much pixel art, it was fun to stretch a bit #art
Record profits = unpaid wages.