| Website | https://www.erikahammerschmidt.com |
| Tumblr | https://erikahammerschmidt.tumblr.com/contact |
HAPPY JULIET B-DAY
remember everyone! tomorrow is Bread Loaf Day, and "If Lady Capulet Had Been In Labor A Few Hours Longer Her Kid Would've Been Named Augusta" day
woohoooo
Anyone done a limerick about it yet?
Probably.
Something like
There was a Cyberman from Nantucket
Who decided that he'd Cybertruck it
His hilarious wrecks
Got him no Cyber sex
And we'll soon see him kick the Cyber bucket.
I know this verse is probably describing two different times when Father McKenzie was working
But I like to imagine he got so carried away with darning his socks that he started embroidering a sermon onto them
If today's Internet is a vastly disappointing shadow of the hyped-up glory and magic that it once promised us, now barren, overpriced and depleted of all good things...
then the farce that Elon Musk has made of Twitter is like some even more soulless, villainous monster, concealing itself in the walls of this crumbling edifice
in other words...
let X equal the Unknown
AND I was only thinking about it now because
1. I rewatched the Doctor Who episode "Tooth and Claw" where Ten and Rose were trying to go to 1979 and rock out with all the classic music coming out then, but accidentally went to 1879 and had to protect Queen Victoria from a werewolf
2. it occurred to me that if they HAD gotten to 1979 as planned, the recently-released song "Werewolves of London" would have been prominent among the 70's music they got to enjoy
Have only heard the song "Werewolves of London" a few times in my life, but for years I was so sure it contained a mention of the Chinese New Year. I think I somehow misheard "saw a werewolf with a Chinese menu" as "saw a werewolf at the Chinese New Year"
and I only questioned it just now.... because I realized the Chinese New Year is a lunar new year that takes place at the new moon
...the exact opposite of when you could (knowingly) see a werewolf
"Okay, Frank Herbert, I'm assigned as your Double Entendre Consultant. I hear we have things to work on."
"?"
"First. Let's imagine a character mentions a 'little death.' What would this refer to?"
"Fear that brings total annihilation."
"...Um... okay. Moving along... Imagine a male character gets aroused. What words could you use for this"
"Beefswelling"
...Frank Herbert. Write in such a way that the first sexual metaphor anyone associates with you is WHAT THE FUCK
hey... has Futurama ever done a Threshold Day episode
like, Farnsworth mods their ship to go way too fast, to the point where you screw with temporal physics so bad that you start transforming into the evolutionary future destiny of your species
but of course they acknowledge that everything evolves into crabs eventually
so like, everyone changes, except Zoidberg