"Mmm... Yes, downsize the workforce, yes, that should raise shareholder profit, mmm, business, yes." The CEO said into his very expensive cell phone. He was indeed very business.

As he walked onto the rooftop, he noticed that there were letters floating in the air nearby. He looked them over, trying to figure out why they were there and not his helicopter, but having been selected for his clear genetic predisposition for being a CEO, and not literacy, he had some trouble piecing them together...

"S... K... A... T... E?" he made them out one at a time, "That doesn't sound very business."

Suddenly, he heard the sound of scraping metal, and just as he turned to look, someone whizzed by him, the loud rolling of small wheels causing him to flinch. He felt a puff of wind against his crotch, followed by a sharp pain.

"Gnarly!"

He looked down to realize his penis had been stolen!!

"MY PENIS!" he cried, "NOW I'LL BE PAID 70% LESS!!"

The #PenisStealingSkateboarders had struck again!

@boingbot I expect that team Trump will shortly release a fake video of Trump looking senile so as to provide a prebuttal for the many genuine ones of Trump looking senile.

Biden is slightly older but the strain of being President isn't anything like the strain of being an insolvent property developer who has just been found liable for rape, is facing a crippling penalty for fraud and is under four criminal indictments. Plus, Trump didn't exactly have very much upstairs to start with.

Hey I'm walkin' here

#NYC #TimesSquare