If I recall there is an FDA rule that says you can’t sell a food item that contains a non edible thing that could cause someone to choke.

Edit: Here it is

Section 402(d)(1) of the Federal Food, Drug, and Cosmetic Act provides that confectionery having partially, or completely imbedded therein, any non-nutritive object is adulterated unless FDA has issued a regulation recognizing that the non-nutritive object is of practical functional value to the confectionery product and would not render the product injurious or hazardous to health.

From wikipedia:

United States

A 1938 law, the Federal Food, Drug, and Cosmetic Act, prohibits confectionery products that contain a “non-nutritive object”, unless the non-nutritive object has functional value.[35] Essentially, the Act bans “the sale of any candy that has embedded in it a toy or trinket”.[36]

In 1997, the staff of the Consumer Product Safety Commission examined and issued a recall for some Kinder Surprise illegally brought into the US with foreign labels.[37] The staff determined that the toys within the eggs had small parts. The staff presumed that Kinder Surprise, being a chocolate product, was intended for children of all ages, including those under three years of age. On this basis, the staff took the position that Kinder Surprise was in violation of the small parts regulation and should be banned from importation into the US.[37]

Kinder Surprise eggs are legal in Canada and Mexico, but are illegal to import into the US. In January 2011, the US Customs and Border Protection (CBP) threatened a Manitoba resident with a 300 Canadian dollar fine for carrying one egg across the US border into Minnesota.[38] In June 2012, CBP held two Seattle men for two and a half hours after discovering six Kinder Surprise eggs in their car upon returning to the US from a trip to Vancouver. According to Joseph Cummings of Seattle, Washington, one of the men detained, a border guard quoted the potential fine as “$2,500 per egg”.[39]

In 2012, the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) re-issued their import alert stating “The embedded non-nutritive objects in these confectionery products may pose a public health risk as the consumer may unknowingly choke on the object”.[40]

Kinder Surprise bears warnings advising the consumer that the toy is “not suitable for children under three years, due to the presence of small parts”, and that “adult supervision is recommended”.[41]

As of 2017 Kinder Joy eggs, a similar product, are being sold in the United States. Instead of a toy being encased in a chocolate egg, it is in an egg-shaped plastic package with the toy and chocolate separated. Kinder Surprise eggs are still illegal in the US, but remain popular on the black market.[42][43]

The chocolate content of the Kinder Surprise and Kinder Joy is what differentiates them. Kinder Joy has a spoon to eat a creme inside, while Kinder Surprise is two-layer chocolate—milk chocolate on the outside and white chocolate on the inside.[44]

Kinder Egg, now with a spicy surprise.

But the problem is shipping that fucker enclosed, because all the logistic chain is going to be a pain in the ass. People dying off quicker than you can replace them.

I bought one branded as having Pokemon figures in it, but it had fucking Mickey Mouse in it.

I’d be less angry with a demon core. (cuz I’d be dead and thus unable to feel anything)