Oracle, "Go!"
Sinbad, "Go?"
Oracle, "Go north. I guess whatever. I dunno man. I'm just the messenger here. "
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

Hey if Caroline Munro smiled at me after I took off my belt and dropped my pants I'd trust in Allah too.
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

Tiny gargoyle bat friend 2.0 nooooooo! 😭
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

Does the gargoyle die dot com
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

Racism against green people? 70s racism you always find new weird ways to make me feel uncomfortable.
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

Is obeyasance a word?
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

First a wooden golem. The gargoyles looked like rock. Now he commands a six armed iron golem. Koura is the master of all elemental summoning.
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

Six sword style! Sinbad you REALLY should have brought a Zoro for this voyage for that one last piece of the map.
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

Cool fight scene and cat in my lap kept me too distracted to comment, but that one smiling statue Sinbad sat his ass on looked cool. I guess it inspired that D&D cover?
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

Koura has finally completed the golden pizzelle of legend.
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

At this point the fountain should be cursed and turn Koura into a giant monster.
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

Caroline Munro was the real One Piece all along. Wait no, but kinda basically.
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

A 1970s jumpscare!? Huh.
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

Hark! A second stop motion horror approaches! For some reason I guess?
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

Koura just tapped day ass. With a sword. Effectively hamstringing a griffin.
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

Sinbad and the back stab feat for critical damage.
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

Koura now has a Devil Fruit power. Dark Dark fruit made him invisible.
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

Predator stole this move . But god damn that fountain of blood looks awesome.
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

Mysterious monsters wandering around a pond distributing crowns is no basis for a system of government. You must be elected by a mandate from the masses. Not by some farcical aquatic voyage.
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

"But tie up your camel!" Hahaha they brought it back. 🐪 🐫
#Monsterdon #GoldenVoyageofSinbad

Wait what @miru ? Kazaam??? I guess I wasn't paying attention to the schedule this week.
#Monsterdon #monsterdondoublefeature

Kazaam... Okay I guess I'm gonna hal watch this now. After I clean up a dish and get more juice. Or maybe alcohol. This movie might require alcohol
#Monsterdon #Kazaam

Back to Sinbad. You made so many mythology movies Harryhausen. You even stuck a cyclops and a centaur and a griffin into this Arabian nights movie. But you never put a stop motion minotaur in a movie???
#Monsterdon

Wtf? Oh there's the unneeded trans joke in a 90s movie for kids. Jeez.
#Monsterdon #Kazaam

So they found the kid with the most annoying voice to star in this?
#Monsterdon #Kazaam

Can this kid find the Wishmaster instead of Shaq? I want to see his wishes turned into an ironic death.
#Monsterdon #Kazaam

Genie was sleeping in an ancient boom box? Okay not the worst idea.
Is every one of his scenes gonna be sing talking?
#Monsterdon #Kazaam

"Hey. Hey! Hold your camels." -Shaq
Tie up your camels!!
#Monsterdon #Kazaam

Did... Okay I was just walking back and forth playing with cat and... Did I just hear the boy say, "until I make those last two wishes, I own you" ? said to Shaq... Did he imply he owns a tall black man.
I must have heard that wrong. Right?
Padme asking again, right???
#Monsterdon #Kazaam

Meanwhile my cat just carried an ice cube from one end of the house down to my computer room so she could show me how she plays with it.
#Monsterdon

Did the kid take Shaq to a concert to try and get him laid??
#Monsterdon #Kazaam

I might be disassociating. Kazaam rapping about a man in a halo turning him into a genie... Jesus made Shaq a genie? Or some saint what is going on in this movie?
#Monsterdon #Kazaam

Occasionally they give Shaq a good line. But 90% of this movie is horrible and/or insufferable.
#Monsterdon #Kazaam

Did we need a scene of Shaq acting like a professional wrestler in a movie where we are waiting for him to do his signature move in a fight.
#Monsterdon #Kazaam

Did Shaq just kill a guy with the power of basketball?
#Monsterdon #Kazaam

Shaq has become the Master Control Program?
#Monsterdon #Kazaam

So this is the bad ending right? It's a bad movie.
#Monsterdon #Kazaam

Today's double feature was one good 70s movie thanks to Harryhausen's special effects (lsp lots of sweaty people showing skin), and one really bad genie movie from the 90s. Somehow the 90s movie topped the casual racism of the 80s movie? Why? And some really poor taste "jokes"
#Monsterdon #monsterdondoublefeature

Kazaam is the most wrong frog of all.
Atleast I can't think of a worse second movie we've had. If there was one I blotted it out.
I have skipped a few though.
. . . oh wait no that Italian Godzilla was more personally offensive.
#Monsterdon