tyzbiti can't stop thinking about the death of Nurul Amin Shah Alam. it just blows a hole clean through my heart. Nurul was blind, dropped off in front of a closed store at night (except for drive through), he was using a curtain rod as a cane and spoke little English, no electronic devices.
this poor man wandered for 5 days, lost and isolated from people who could understand him. he lived a life leading up to this, years of it. he came here with his wife and two children. refugees, pleading for mercy from us. and we let him die alone. we KILLED HIM.
how can I even get up in the morning when every story like this is devastating? how can i go to work and do my job when people's whole worlds are ending in violent, cold and brutal ways? how can i go to sleep at night knowing every single fucking day people are dying in painful, terrible ways. collectively thousands of years of life ended so carelessly, families and whole communities mourning someone smothered to death out of unthinking hate.
god damn these people. god damn them if there are any gods at all.
regardless of what god may do, i will damn them too.
i will damn them for the grotesquery of their soul.