MostlyHarmless
A Russian spy, a sexual predator, and a washed-up billionaire walk into a bar.
The bartender says, "What can I get you, Mr. President?"
Feb 20 at 3:05amWeb
Show threadBirchosaurus4d ago

@MostlyHarmless surprisingly, President Pedo doesn’t drink.

Maybe make the setting a restaurant and say “Welcome Mr. President, your usual table?”

Show threadJoel VanderWerf4d ago
@MrBirch @MostlyHarmless "Your usual diet coke, Mr President?"
Show threadIgnazio Palmisano3d ago
@joelvanderwerf @MrBirch @MostlyHarmless "why do you always drink your coke alone, sir?"
Show threadBen Royce 🇺🇦 🇸🇩4d ago

@MrBirch @MostlyHarmless

there's a story behind that

donald grew up watching his dad harass his brother and drive his brother to drink

and his brother drank himself to death

donald swore off the drink, and instead just became his dad, the abuser

Show threadPanta Rhei3d ago
@MrBirch how about: ”A Russian spy, a sexual predator, and a washed-up billionaire walk into a pizzeria.
The owner says, ’Welcome Mr. President, the same as usual …?‘“ 🤔
@MostlyHarmless
Show thread🇨🇦 Maverick ✊🇲🇲🇺🇦🇻🇪🇬🇱3d ago
@pantaRhei @MrBirch @MostlyHarmless It should be McDonald’s. 😉
Show threadBirchosaurus3d ago

@maverick604 @pantaRhei @MostlyHarmless
And his order is likely this.

https://www.tiktok.com/@netflixisajoke/video/7315086107685735726

TikTok - Make Your Day

Show threadCy4d ago
...fair play
Show threadxs4me23d ago
@MostlyHarmless 🎯
Show threadWilliam Campbell3d ago
@MostlyHarmless Israeli would be more suitable
Show threadAbazigal3d ago

@MostlyHarmless OG IPhone keynote flashbacks.

A Russian spy. A sexual predator. A washed up billionaire. Are you getting it? These aren’t 3 separate people…😝

Show thread￣へ￣3d ago
@MostlyHarmless i dont get the russian spy part lol o_O
Show threadIgnazio Palmisano3d ago
@Lin_wowies @MostlyHarmless russian asset then
Show threadQuinn Norton3d ago
@Lin_wowies @MostlyHarmless there's been a lot of rumors over the years, because he's been a putin fan for so long. they're almost certainly not true (who would clock this guy as reliable enough to be a spy?) but they are funny.
Show threadJimmy3d ago
@MostlyHarmless 'Mr. President, who are you today?'?
Show threadJeff3d ago
@MostlyHarmless @gedeonm TBF, has he released his tax returns to prove his wealth? I'm still considering him a poor washed up Russian spy sexual predator...
Show threadTimo Kramer3d ago
@MostlyHarmless in the UK they had this very joke from 2019-2022, only it was 'millionaire' and 'Prime Minister' instead.
Show threadcybergoths2d ago
@MostlyHarmless The answer is “The Diet Coke made with Cane Sugar”.