At a bar and need help? Order an "Angel shot".

-"with lime" means call the police.

- "on the rocks" means you need a taxi called.

- "neat" means you need an escort to your car.

You can also ask for Angela, as in "is Angela working tonight?"

See also the "help me" hand gesture: https://beige.party/@amiserabilist/114876091506990343

#Safety #Signals #PSA

paul (@amiserabilist@beige.party)

Attached: 1 video i did not know about the hand signal for help me, and my stupid ass thought she was flirting. The Signal for Help (or the Violence at Home Signal for Help) is a single-handed gesture that can be used over a video call or in person by an individual to alert others that they feel threatened and need help.[1] Originally, the signal was created as a tool to combat the rise in domestic violence cases around the world linked to self-isolation measures that were related to the COVID-19 pandemic.[2] The signal is performed by holding one hand up with the thumb tucked into the palm, then folding the four other fingers down, symbolically trapping the thumb by the rest of the fingers.[3] It was designed intentionally as a single continuous hand movement, rather than a sign held in one position, so it could be made easily visible. The Signal for Help was created by the Canadian Women's Foundation and introduced on April 14, 2020.[4] It soon spread via the TikTok social video platform and was adopted by the international Women's Funding Network (WFN). It received widespread praise from Canadian[5] and international[6][7] news organizations for helping provide a modern solution to the issue of a rise in domestic violence cases. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Signal_for_Help

beige.party

@alice oh, I hadn't heard of Angel shots before. Looks like they're served down here too!

And I could've sworn the hand signal was older than that (but I'd apparently be wrong πŸ˜…)...

@alice I wonder how effective this is. But then I'm rarely in a bar.

@JigmeDatse the more helpful people who know about it, the more effective it is.

Ideally we'd teach people about boundaries and consent in a meaningful way, and have effective social and legal deterrents against violating someone, but we (in the US at least) don't, so reactive safety like the above is better than nothing.

@alice @JigmeDatse I think I've told the story before of when a woman grabbed my arm on the street and said "pretend we know each other". A guy had been following her for a long time, and she'd even taken off her shoes and was walking barefoot on concrete to outpace him. It was early hours of the morning.

I veered us into a blues party because who wants to deal with two dozen actual gangsters? I vaguely knew the owner of the house and so talked us in. She was called a taxi and got home safe.

@ApostateEnglishman @alice Yes, I think that there are ways that things certainly can work. The idea that a "secret code" may work. Unless... It's generally understood that people just check things when something doesn't really click. Glad it worked out.
@JigmeDatse @alice @ApostateEnglishman it's not necessarily secret, I've been in bars that have signs up about asking for Angela
@lambic @alice @ApostateEnglishman OK. I said I just didn't know, and that I don't go to bars very often.

@JigmeDatse @alice @lambic With the greatest respect - and I do mean this, let's not get into an argument! - I think you're being a tad negative here. Obviously the "secret code" system isn't perfect. For a start, you'd be relying on the bartender knowing about it, which is a gamble in itself. The second hurdle is them having the professionalism to handle it discreetly. It's a long shot, but a long shot is better than no shot at all.

If it saves even one life, it's worth knowing about.

@ApostateEnglishman @alice @lambic "With the greatest respect," and "let's not get into an argument."

Those are things that usually mean, "this is the place to stop reading if you don't want to get into an argument."

And... I have to say that is correct. Thank you.
@ApostateEnglishman @alice @lambic Here's what I said:

"I was just saying that I do not know. And that I don't go to bars that often."

I'm sorry what's "a tad negative" about it. If that's "a tad negative," what you are doing is
astronomically negative.

@JigmeDatse @alice @lambic So you admit that you don't know, and also admit that you don't go into bars much and so have little experience. People here are telling you about their lived experiences.

Interesting. Yet you carry on talking because...

*checks your demographic*

...yep, you can't help it. Ta ta, darling, you're surplus to requirement. πŸ‘‹

@ApostateEnglishman @JigmeDatse @lambic can y'all keep it friendly to each other in my threads? I'd really appreciate it β€οΈβ€πŸ©Ή

If something breaks a server rule, report it. Otherwise, there's a block/mute button if it seems warranted.

But I'd prefer y'all to talk it out and part on good terms.

@alice @ApostateEnglishman @lambic Thank you... Reported... Good to know that you breaking a server rule, should be reported.
@lambic @JigmeDatse @alice @ApostateEnglishman Signs in the women’s restroom, or in the bar proper?
If they were in the main part of the bar, can a code really work if everyone knows the code?

@Gorfram it's still reasonable to the bar, look like you're ordering a drink, and have a couple words convey the situation. Also, never underestimate people's ability to be oblivious to things that they don't think pertain to them.

@lambic @JigmeDatse @ApostateEnglishman

@alice My local grocery store has stickers at the entrances now mentioning the "ask for Angela" thing.

@alice potentially also: Ask for Clive

Dunno how widespread it is in practice, and even then probably has similar problems to Ask for Angela, but still, it's around and potentially worth a shot.

@alice There was an incident a couple years ago where someone on the freeway saw a woman in another car making the hand gesture out her car windows. They called 911, the other car was stopped; and it turned out the woman was being kidnapped.
So it seems like the hand gesture is at least well enough known to work sometimes.

https://www.theguardian.com/technology/video/2021/nov/08/girl-rescued-in-us-after-using-tiktok-domestic-violence-hand-signal-video

Girl rescued in US after using TikTok domestic violence hand signal – video

A teenager was rescued after using a hand gesture described on the social media app TikTok to signal to motorists that she was in trouble

The Guardian
@alice I guess this is region-specific. I've seen very different protocols promoted elsewhere.

@womble seems like the Angela campaign has been going on for some years in a number of countries.

But I've heard that some bars have specific "help drinks".

@alice Bars need to be better at training their staff for these things too. https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c789nn3d918o
Ask for Angela: BBC exposes pubs failing to enforce safety scheme

The Ask for Angela initiative aims to provide a discreet lifeline for those feeling unsafe.

BBC News
@alice in germany one can ask for luisa in many locations, see https://luisa-ist-hier.de/#kampagne
redesign2025

Luisa ist hier!