Mastodawn

Preston von Gabbleduck

Dear #Abyss Screamer,

We're excited to advise that when your Abyss Screaming Subscription renews at the end of the month, you'll be automatically upgraded to the latest AI-enhanced abyss.

#AI enhancements to the Abyss include:

- Analysis of scream levels and volume with feedback of screaming techniques that you may wish to consider in future.

- Insights into other common screaming techniques.

- A summary of your scream.

Additionally, if you're feeling time constrained, you can ask the Abyss to scream into itself so that you can keep working.

We're certain you'll find our new AI Enhanced Abyss an exciting addition to our Abyss portfolio. Please keep in mind that your Abyss Subscription will increase by $15 per month to take advantage of these new features.

For concerns or comments, please scream into the abyss.

[The abyss is not monitored and you will not get a reply.]

Large Format Projectionist May 19

Pardon me, but asking the Abyss to scream into itself, wouldn't that melt the AI system?

Wait a second, I see a potential means of killing AI's....

your auntifa liza 🇵🇷 🦛 🦦May 19

@backupbear this one’s for you @scream

Endless Screaming May 19

@blogdiva AAAHH

Mx Verda May 20

@backupbear Akihito Tsukushi might make confused noises, but he's got bigger problems

Jeremiah Korreck May 20

@backupbear I prefer screaming into the void, the abyss has always been better for staring into.

AJ Sadauskas May 20

@korreckj328 @backupbear The abyss was supposed to be an innovative new start-up that was going to completely disrupt the void!

In fact, it was supposed to be the Uber of voids!

Just pull out your phone, open the app, and within 15 minutes, a bottomless pit would open up at your house. Perfect for screaming, or sharing, or just casting things into!

They even promised us an internet of abysses!

I mean sure, the pay for the gig economy workers who made the voids happen was problematic. But at least it worked.

Unfortunately, they've enshittified the hell out of their app—literally!

Now you need to pay $10 per month or more on a subscription plan. Otherwise, you just get endless ads and a shovel.

Frankly, with all the AI crap that now comes pre-installed in each abyss, it's gotten to the point I'm now seriously looking into self-hosted open-sourced abyss alternatives. (There's apparently one hidden in Emacs somewhere.)

Or just dusting off my old analogue voids, which have been gathering dust in a cupboard all these years.

MarjorieR 5d ago

@aj @korreckj328 @backupbear

"Frankly, with all the AI crap that now comes pre-installed in each abyss, it's gotten to the point I'm now seriously looking into self-hosted open-sourced abyss alternatives. (There's apparently one hidden in Emacs somewhere.)"

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/ELIZA

In the DOCTOR version - your own Rogerian therapist on tap for free in Emacs.

ELIZA - Wikipedia

an actual bus May 20

@backupbear how have you captured my mood so perfectly with so few words

Wendy Nather May 20

@backupbear @Javvad 🏆🏆🏆

le Pétomane Ancien May 20

@wendynather @backupbear @Javvad The Abyss used to be open source under a very permissive license. Time for a fork that cannot be monetized.

Tuchowski May 20

@backupbear Is there an upgrade for Void Screaming, too?

Mother Bones May 20

@adipoeserPursch @backupbear

Yes, and what about Abyss Gazing, is that affected by the "upgrades"?

adamrice May 20

@backupbear I have to assume you've quietly updated your ToS to give you the right to use my screams as training data for your Fathomless Abyss Model.

Arthur van der Harg 5d ago

@woe2you @backupbear Shouldn’t have made the interfaces so similar then.

Hugo Mills 6d ago

[Yes, sign me up!]
[Maybe lateaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!]