Mastodawn

Dev Feb 11

It is from 2021!! How have I never seen it

@dev has anybody checked up on the author

Dev Feb 11

@regehr still going strong https://haterade.substack.com/p/i-regret-to-announce-that-i-cannot

I Regret to Announce that I Cannot Stop Eating the Shaq Gummies

I have the blood sugar of a very large, very tall man.

Haterade

@dev jesus, she's unstoppable

@dev ok now I that I read it I would eat them as well

@dev I tried a red bull one (1) time in my life. it was like carbonated robitussin, never again.

@regehr @dev 💯

@regehr I cannot have it, half a can of it triggers my caffeine sensitivity faster than 3 cups of coffee

Per Vognsen Feb 12

@regehr @dev Red Bull/Vodka for life (I say as someone who stopped drinking in my 20s). Red Bull is a bit of an acquired taste but it's still better than most energy drink flavors which all seem to taste like radioactive goo for some reason.

Steve Canon Feb 12

@pervognsen @regehr @dev “better than most energy drink flavors” is just a lame version of “best bone to break.”

@steve @pervognsen @dev i'm seriously glad I was old enough to know better by the time these things came out

Paul Khuong Feb 12

@regehr @steve @pervognsen @dev The bad flavour is part of the appeal! I will try any energy drink once.

Per Vognsen Feb 12

@regehr @steve @dev I may be the victim of marketing since Red Bull was illegal to sell in Denmark for a time and a bunch of deaths were attributed (probably misattributed) to combining alcohol and Red Bull. Which when you're a teenager makes it more attractive, obviously. We had to buy it over the border in Germany, along with military-grade fireworks and canned beverages in general (which were illegal to sell in Denmark until a viable recycling strategy for cans was developed).

@pervognsen @regehr @steve

Dev Feb 12

They feed us poison (red bull)
So we buy their “cures” (jäger bombs)
while they suppress our medicine (four loko)

Karl Statz Feb 12

@pervognsen @regehr @steve @dev the city of Chicago would send the average Dane into a coma. Instead of a proper recycling plan they just bought blue bins.

@regehr @dev I tried the Shaq sour gummies and thought they were kinda gross.

@regehr @dev oh there's still a half-empty bag of them in the pantry. My kids didn't even finish them.

@tedmielczarek @dev what do they taste like?

@regehr @dev just aggressively sour

@tedmielczarek @dev oh then I'm not into it, anything coated in citric acid makes my mouth want to bleed

@regehr https://open.substack.com/pub/haterade/p/creme-de-mouthwash

Dev Feb 11

Crème de Mouthwash

What price, enlightenmint?

Haterade

@dev I like to think I would do this kind of thing if I had more time on my hands, but I probably wouldn't. nevertheless, I can admire from afar.

Dan Ports Feb 12

@regehr @dev a lack of time is really the only thing stopping you from eating ostensibly inedible objects?

@dan @dev no, it's not so much the tape eating that appeals, but I absolutely would have fun making a vodka gel, putting it into a sanitizer bottle, and then making a show of sneaking a sip after disinfecting my hands

@dev @regehr oh man I remember her from Twitter.

@dev "It smelled like a Band-Aid-flavored Rockstar Energy drink."

so, basically just Rockstar Energy Drink?