see this is what happens when you pretend to be religious but don't actually know how the story ends

@ElleGray

Also Goliath was a Philistine.

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/Philistine

a: a person who is guided by materialism and is usually disdainful of intellectual or artistic values

b: one uninformed in a special area of knowledge

That tracks, actually.

Definition of PHILISTINE

Definition of 'Philistine' by Merriam-Webster

@Sir_Osis_of_Liver @ElleGray

that's not usually what I think of when you say "Philistine". I usually think of a geographical origin.

...in modern English, the term for "Philistine" is "Gaza strip".

@draNgNon @Sir_Osis_of_Liver @ElleGray Ah so Trumps is going to outsource the Canadian border war to the Palestinians' well that should cheer up Netanyahu.😈 👽 🖖
@Sir_Osis_of_Liver @ElleGray
For added irony, Philistine also became Palestine.
@ElleGray this is hilarious!
@kimlockhartga @ElleGray how do you get Dr. Pepper out of a keyboard? Asking for a friend.
@gwync You pray the spray away.
@ElleGray back in my Christian epoch I heard something about the composition of armies in those days and how it really isn't that surprising that an expert slinger can take down heavy infantry
@jackeric @ElleGray if Goliath was anywhere near as large as he was described in the Bible, he would have had a hard time moving or standing upright. It's feasible that he would have been used to intimidate their opponents into surrendering, but otherwise wasn't very capable of much else on the battlefield.
@jhooper @jackeric @ElleGray So something that kinda blew my mind once I realized it: Goliath’s height is based on measurements made by hands when the average height was like 4’11”. So he was probably like Shaq height or something. But to a people that were in the high-4s, that dude would be HUGE. (Which doesn’t negate your statement about how he might’ve had like giantism or something; just an additional layer to add to the story.)
@jhooper @jackeric @ElleGray Also, I don't think the ancient Hebrews had figured out the square-cube law yet.

@ElleGray this sounds like something an abuser would say.

If you hadn't made me angry, I wouldn't have hit you.

@SarcastiCarrie you're absolutely right. Besides being nonsense, he sounds like a high school bully

@ElleGray Wow!

I'm neither Jewish nor Christian but even I know how that story ends!

@ElleGray

Goliath, please meet David...

@ElleGray Buckling one end of the sling to their wrist, presumably. And slotting a bottle of Moosehead into the pouch.
@ElleGray So true! Their lack of self awareness is just comical.

@ElleGray

@blogdiva

Canada has been good to us. This is so fucked up

@ElleGray

Reverse tarrifs can be a deadly slingshot rock.

@ElleGray He's just another mental case.

@ElleGray
This is a great reference, especially when you consider that the Canadian government has some pretty strong backing from its own people here, while the United States government does not. This is likely going to be Trump's Waterloo, in which simply outlasting him is very viable, and everyone working against him knows it.

So yes, Trump is very much like Goliath here, stomping about thinking himself invincible, about to find out what happens when you pick on the little guy.

@ElleGray Tell us you haven't read the buy-bull without telling us you haven't read the buy-bull.
@ElleGray so their economy is about 25 B, china is 17 B, add in Mexico for 2(?) B and us at 1 B ok number are approximate, not so big now if we coordinate our counter tariffs
@ElleGray @gleick HAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH…. Sigh.
@ElleGray
I'm buckled. Let's Go! Oh wait. Maybe in 30 days.

@ElleGray

"Had Canada been treating us fairly"

"We wouldn't have to do this, you made me. Why are you always making me hit you. Stop hitting yourself, you're just hitting yourself. Are you crying?"

Shame.

How is it possible for these whitened sepulchres to not collapse in shame.

#uspol #canada

@ElleGray treating them unfairly by letting them tear up our previous trade agreement, and then signing on to the one they replaced it with. lol
@ElleGray Bring it on Jack Miladin, Canadians are ready to kick your ass and every demented Republican in your “country”.
@ElleGray
I heard Canada was really big...

@ElleGray

These people lack knowledge in a lot of areas, not only religious context.

@ElleGray Can us sane Americans send Canada a bunch of stones and slingshots? We would love to go back to being good neighbors.
@ElleGray (actually JACK MILADIN) It is Simply incredible to imagine Canada has been treating US UNfairly. I'm not naive, but if your enemy punches your face and your friend pinches your arm--you don't beat up your friend.
@ElleGray Rumor has it that, after seeing Jack Miladin's reply about "taking on Goliath", Justin Trudeau decided to not impose tariffs on slingshots imported from the U.S. Meanwhile Italy is offering support by loaning a statue of some guy named David.
@ElleGray Better watch out, Canada - you may have polar bears but we're using frogs to clone Velociraptors
@jackheathwriter @ElleGray Our government is holding a press conference on how to establish a working partnership with the velociraptors that established their nation-state south of our border after their "dinner"
@ElleGray How exactly has canada been treating us unfairly? Looks like you are just parroting a certain clueless administrator rather than thinking this through.
@ElleGray And Trump folded faster than Superman on wash day!
@ElleGray their stupidity is really something to see. I had no idea how ignorant and ill educated some these people are
@ElleGray
Most Evangelicals have never read the Bible. They just use it as a convenient justification for imposing their own bigotry on other people.
@ElleGray a few hundred people asked if he had read the bible but Jack/John claimed he wasn’t making an analogy (which he in fact was doing) but merely making an anal-ogy (which is something else again).
@ElleGray This is what you get when US businesses & residents ask to buy something from you & you sell it to them.
@ElleGray Always ask yourself, what would goatherders of the Bronze Age do ?

@ElleGray

Reminds me of that time Daniel got himself thrown into a den of lions — ha, what an idiot!

@ElleGray

This happens, if you always hold the bible upside down.

🤦

@ElleGray @Dss and don’t know on who’s side god was on.

@ElleGray Oh, but Trump staff are working on the American bible, which contains the correct ending for stories like this.

Once published, citing from or referring to the Eurasian bible will get you a one way ticket to Guatanamo Bay.