Queer Satanic“You ever go through your closet and realize nothing is gonna look good?"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309232947/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don123.html
“Did your roommate just say he was going to ‘freshen his make-up’?”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309233000/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don124.html
"Upset? Of course I'm upset! My son is moving out of State! He has to — His husband's been transferred."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309200756/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don125.html
"Oh, Dad!"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309200743/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don126.html
"I can't tell you how relieved I am since Harold's hired himself a male secretary.”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309200755/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don127.html
"Bob, Dad... I... I... don't want to hurt you... but, I've been seeing this... this... girl."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309201509/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don128.html
"One more 'Sushi is so chic' and you're shark bait, fella!"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309201544/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don129.html
“I guess we can forget about gettin' lucky as long as we're shipwrecked here."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309201534/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don130.html
"Well, just what did you expect Moby Dick to be about?”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309201558/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don131.html
"I knew a homosexual. George knew a homosexual. You must have so much in common. So here we are.”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309201831/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don132.html
"I wanna know what the hell happened to the sexual harassment in this office... huh?... huh?"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309210931/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don133.html
"I don't like to generalize, but, of course, all gays have great taste in design, fashion, cuisine, and the latest latex toys."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203235/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don134.html
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https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203222/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don135.html
“I don’t know! I put the orange juice on the table, he glared at me, said ‘Mother, how could you?’ and stormed out.”’
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203238/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don136.html
"All I ask for is grand-children... What do I get? A construction worker and two Shih Tzus."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203348/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don137.html
“I still say same-sex dancing is *not* a crime!”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203406/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don138.html
“Tell me, Captain, is flogging still practiced on board ship?”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203355/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don139.html
“Is the gentleman having another problem with his seatbelt... again?”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203419/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don140.html
“I hope you realize that your heterosexuality will not necessarily prejudice my eventual affectional-preference choice.”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203418/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don141.html
“Now, dear, tell me... which one of you does, you know, the man’s things?”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203441/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don142.html
"Interesting resume... Do you really consider shopping a hobby?"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203506/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don143.html
"Just a bunch of bills for Dad and me and a letter addressed to... 'Helium Heels'?"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203501/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don144.html
"Yes dear, Daddy's friend *is* hung. Now go back to your room."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203519/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don145.html
“I think Daddy took it rather well. Don't you, dear?”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203558/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don146.html
"The couple next door sunbathe nude. But don't bother... they're both guys."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203616/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don147.html
"Uncle James is here! and he's brought *another* boyfriend."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203617/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don148.html
"Mom and Dad feel they should experience my lifestyle, before they can fully accept it."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203622/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don149.html
#Donelan #Undescribed
"OK, maybe it's too soon for 'lover'. But isn't 'the guy I fuck' just a bit graphic?"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203702/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don05/don150.html
“If your mother refers to me just once as your 'little phase’, I'm outta here.”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203650/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don151.html
"OK, maybe pottery is your life's calling.”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203718/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don152.html
"Next time, let *me* book the cruise, OK?"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203759/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don153.html
"Hoo, boy! Check out the boobs on that one!"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203807/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don154.html
“Ya know... I wish you had never heard of this Barbara Cartland.”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203832/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don155.html
"Don't you love it? It's called 'Golden Island Surprise'!"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203900/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don156.html
“Let's face it. Growing our own rice was a dumb idea."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203848/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don157.html
"Nobody ever said anything about boy-girl, boy-girl to me!"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203912/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don158.html
"....and whichever one of you guys is going around shooting gay guys in the dick better knock it off!”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203923/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don159.html
"...bulletproof vest."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203924/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don160.html
"Excuse me... could we have a little chat?"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203932/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don161.html
“Either you guys put a little effort into this relationship or I swear... no more booster shots!"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203947/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don162.html
“No. He's not up to a party tonight... that time of the month, you know."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309203937/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don163.html
“They always leave something out of these damn kits. I can't find the fidelity.”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309204039/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don164.html
"I know this doesn't compute, doc, but your ass is hot."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309204053/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don165.html
"Okay, ya got one wish... what'll it be? A major dick, serious pecs or a wardrobe to die for."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309210106/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don166.html
"'Good heavens. I thought that you meant your new neighbors was gay!"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309233751/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don167.html
"You been hangin' around them fairies again?"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309233804/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don168.html
“I can give you the great bod and the big dick, but a faithful lover... that's a tough one."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309233807/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don169.html
“One wish?... Well, I would like to be able to wear spandex shorts and not hang over the top.”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309234002/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don170.html
"So... you don't believe in enchanted princes, but you expect me to believe in fairies."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309233958/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don171.html
"A stranger... tall, dark, and... whoa!... is he hung!"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230309233920/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don172.html
"This is the Third World Gays' meeting... Down the hall is the Fourth Dimension Gays."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230313171811/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don173.html
"The only normal thing about the dominant earth species, is that it's divided into the two usual sexes: hetero and homo."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230312212440/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don174.html
"He said, 'It runs on amyl nitrate, and what are you doing after the press conference'."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230312212450/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don175.html
"Finally... a new face!"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230312212503/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don176.html
“Appears to be some sort of mating ritual”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230312212430/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don177.html
“Relax... What's a picnic without a few ants?"
https://web.archive.org/web/20230312212434/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don178.html
“You heard me buddy! I said, drop that spray can or die.”
https://web.archive.org/web/20230312212523/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don179.html
“Eat your people, dear... they're good for you."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230312212517/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don06/don180.html
"Sorry, but I never date men who are prettier than me."
https://web.archive.org/web/20230312212510/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don07/don181.html
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https://web.archive.org/web/20230312212515/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don07/don182.html
"Do you believe this? 'Slave seeks master to serve and worship.' "
https://web.archive.org/web/20230312222502/http://andrejkoymasky.com/lou/don/don07/don183.html