I've tried explaining to her calmly, clearly, and slowly why she can't, say for example, tell a friend that their kid just isn't trying hard enough when friend talks about how standardized testing hurts neurodivergent kids like theirs, or for example why you shouldn't tell me it's my fault for being in poverty because I should've never moved out when I have a breakdown.

She used to be very kind and caring when I was a kid. This isnt like her, I don't know what happened.

@Cheesealicious I’m no expert but I believe this is a very real phenomenon that is quietly tearing our society apart. Now that almost all world leaders have been infected, some repeatedly, things are visibly worse. People just don’t care about others.

Take a look at the #toxoplasmosis and #NoToBrainInfections hashtags.

@Cheesealicious (replying to sorta explain liking what might seem an odd post for a rando to like)

It is very tempting to make some observations about this but they'd be entirely anecdotal and wrapped up in broader observations about people's behaviour these last few years. Probably not what you're looking for, but fwiw I am sorry, I feel for you, it sounds very hurtful

@Cheesealicious

Yes, this is very much a thing I’ve observed directly: a period of emotional dis-regulation lasting a month or two, with reduced emotional & intellectual processing following. We all have bad days, but now the bad days are ‘new normal’. I think mostly people are able to cover using social structures / attitudes / values from pre-infection, but for people who already struggled or lost connections it becomes quite evident.

@Cheesealicious

Not an expert, but it does sound a little like dementia. If she was already prone to it, maybe C19 triggered something. I have seen people with dementia/some age-related memory problem undergo that sort of personality change,

@Cheesealicious I've seen covid trigger or accelerate dementia in older people. Lack of empathy is one possible symptom. I've seen this play out with several relatives, including my late mother.

I've also seen it change personalities. People being depressed for the first time in their lives post-infection. Even without that, a lot of people believe in a just world, and maybe the only way to reconcile with everything these days is to assume everyone deserves what they get?

I've gone no contact with an elderly relative who has become the worst version of herself, ableist and fatphobic, and seemingly unaware of how she affects others, in the last couple years. She's had Covid a few times, but is in her 80s too.

I wish you luck, and I hope your mom's situation isn't as dire as what I've described.

@Cheesealicious Sorry you're dealing with this.

Anecdotally I see a similar deterioration process happening at work, month by month for a couple of years now.

Tempers fraying, empathy disappearing, concentration failing, memory lacking, etc. Requiring all of my patience to continue to be the glue.

More or less impossible to know how much to attribute to covid every few months, to layoffs and other huge work/personal stressors, or to everything else horrible happening in our societies and the world. I would assume it's a combination of all of the above.

Less anecdotally, it seems more or less "certain" medically that covid / long covid can give symptoms similar to early onset dementia, and with 5-15% of the population with long covid at any given time... 🤷🏻‍♂️😬

@Cheesealicious People have mentioned covid-triggered dementia; strokes can also change people's personalities and covid can trigger those too. Just generally covid damages the brain and that's where the empathy happens.

I'm so sorry. It's horrid watching that to someone you love.