August 7, 2023 - Day 219 - NewPlay Review
Total NewPlays: 239
Game: Chivalry II
Platform: Steam
Release Date: Jun 12, 2022
Library Date: Aug 4, 2023
Unplayed: 3d
Playtime: 28m
Sometimes the reveal of the Humble Bundle on the first Tuesday of the month is a pleasant surprise. Sometimes, it's a case of finding I already have the AAA game in the bundle.
Then there's months like this, where I was overjoyed* to see the second game in the bundle.
Chivalry II.
On December 28th last year, in what was the predecessor to this project, my personal rating on the predecessor, Chivalry: Medieval Warfare was "Meh".
It was DirectX 9, laggy as hell, and I didn't even complete the tutorial.
Does Chivalry II turn me into a fan?
First up, like Temtem last month, Chivalry II is primarily a multiplayer game. If I were a cynical woman, I might infer that there are some devs looking to the Humble Bundle there trying to goose the player base on their games.
Chivalry II is a first-person OR third-person medieval battle simulator.
There's no single-player campaign, just a somewhat frustrating tutorial to go through before being thrust onto a multiplayer battlefield.
It's said that trying to create art with a mouse is like trying to draw with a bar of soap, and trying to swing a sword with a bar of soap is worse.
On the off hand that it worked better with a controller, I tried the tutorial with a controller instead.
It was not better.
There were points during the tutorial where I was doing exactly as instructed, and not succeeding.
At one point, I had to block two opponents, and then move the mouse to the left to slash left.
The sword slashed right. I tried repeatedly, eventually figuring I was moving the mouse to the wrong left. I moved it to my other left.
The sword slashed right.
Eventually, mercifully, I made it through the tutorial, and onto the battlefield. At least I could show my mettle, and my metal, against a field full of human opponents.
Ah, no.
That would be a field full of bots. 63 bots and me.
But it was fun, right?
Nope. It was not even that.
Frantically trying to remember all the different ways to block and riposte, and heavy attack and light attack, and it was a lot easier to die than to fight.
I dropped my weapon, and walked away from the battlefield, with no desire to return. I'll cash in the trading cards, and then get 25Gb of NVMe space back.
Chivalry II is a:
1: Nope
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