Her: {changes clothes after mammogram appointment}

Me: {watching intently through open doorways from two rooms away}

Her: "OMG, I forgot to take the marking tape strips off!" {starts peeling them off her tits}

Me: "I just thought you were saving that job for me."

Her: {still peeling} "You don't want to do this job!"

Me: "If you think that, you've ENTIRELY lost track of what I want."

Her: {inaudible muttering}