[smoking a big bowl of crumbled drywall with a butane torch and exhaling a cloud so dense it would shut down arrivals at LaGuardia]

I bet you think it's a coincidence that when federal interest rates went up, the flow of social media videos with women making disgusting pizza and sloppy nachos all started disappearing.

@jackdaw_ruiz the feds started taxing counter space so now they can’t just pour a jar of sauce and cheese with some kind of starch on the counter and call it “homestyle” anymore

@Em

this is why you want to incorporate as an LLC and list the kitchen as your place of business. shave down your taxable income right off the top... the countertop! 😉

#financialdon #taxcheating

@jackdaw_ruiz gonna do this myself and list my pressure cooker as cofounder, we’ll be making bank