TiiaAurora 🌚Nov 7, 2022

already seeing disgusting Forum culture here on Mastodon and really dislike it.
Important conversations are derailed over semantics. Internet things are mansplained to women just because.

That's one way to drive away new users make them less welcome.

Let people explore the Fediverse on their own terms. They will get it right eventually. Don't get triggered when someone is using a word wrong. You'll survive it. There is no need to chime into an ongoing conversation to correct someone

Jess 🚴👩‍⚕️💉😷Nov 8, 2022
Show threadTiiaAurora 🌚

I know a ton of people talk about how welcoming they have experienced Mastodon.

But also keep in mind that certain groups will always have it harder to fit into existing nerdy social structures, because they are seen as lesser knowledgeable or tech savvy.

Look out for that kind of behavior and call it out when you see it. We don't need another toxic boys club on the internet.

Nov 7, 2022 at 10:56pmWeb
Show threadBlue Cat Defends!Nov 8, 2022
@TiiaAurora 🙌🙌🙌
Show threadkurtshNov 8, 2022
@TiiaAurora [applauds] Already seen several people that personify this attitude.
Mocking non-technical journalists trying to learn the differences.
Mocking Twitter transfers asking how to do X they used to do elsewhere.
Mocking any mindset different from their own.
Mocking instead of understanding and educating is a tell-tale sign of a closed mind.
Show threadJuliaNov 8, 2022
@TiiaAurora I get that some people find all social situations harder, but despite being almost technologically illiterate and asking some pretty silly questions I’ve been really lucky that everyone I’ve interacted with has been kind and happy to explain. Perhaps I’ve just been lucky, but I’m definitely not getting boy club vibes.
Show threadTiiaAurora 🌚Nov 8, 2022
@juliacreatesjoy I hope it stays like that for you cause that's how its supposed to be
Show threadJacek RNov 8, 2022
@TiiaAurora Hear!Hear! 👏👏👏
Show threadMaaikeNov 8, 2022

@TiiaAurora

this, I was thinking this when I saw some things pop up in my timeline.

Not sure if I was going to say “read the room” or let it play out to see if I was being overly sensitive to previously established culture.

Thank you for making me more aware

Show threadTiiaAurora 🌚Nov 8, 2022
@MaaikeV I think we need to drop a "read the room" more often.
Show threadConor MurphyNov 8, 2022
@TiiaAurora @MaaikeV my 2c for what it's worth after seeing someone boost this conversation thread and then reading much of the thread so far, mastodon has a danger (because it's federated instances) of descending into people shouting from the safety of their servers. "well *my* instance is all about anarchy and a middle finger to society", "well *mine* is about tolerance and love". "Yes, but be mindful, that both of you are now talking in the public square". federation is a new concept for many
Show threadMaaikeNov 8, 2022

@techcelt @TiiaAurora

I guess what I am most cautious about is the balance between letting people be and where I draw a line in the sand.

People will be people, thanks to the way the fediverse is set up people needing negative attention is less fruitful.

I guess it’s about what society we want to be part of. I, for one, deplore the predominance of bullying under the pretence of ‘being heard’ and the lack of intervention for fear of losing out on 💰 by those in command.

Does that make sense?

Show threadConor MurphyNov 8, 2022
@MaaikeV @TiiaAurora I agree with your stance, I am in a similar mindset. The counterbalance against dark, intolerant corners of the internet is always exposure to the wider society IMHO. Public discourse and interacting with diverse views. An echo chamber is counterproductive.
Show thread🏳️‍⚧️ OwynNov 8, 2022
@TiiaAurora I do love that the argument coming from a certain person on this thread can be boiled down to "Well, we're being mean and exclusionary and pretentious because people were mean to us first!" Two wrongs don't make a right, buddy.
Show threadZed_CzarNov 8, 2022
@TiiaAurora Thank you, this is lovely to read :-)
Show threadMonica CellioNov 9, 2022
@TiiaAurora also, let's keep in mind that the Fediverse isn't *a* community; it's a *bunch* of intersecting communities. If somebody seems like a poor match with *this* server, instead of being dismissive let's try to help that person find a better home! There are lots of opportunities, but the 'verse is kind of hard to navigate for a lot of people. Let's help instead of judging.
Show threadTiiaAurora 🌚Nov 9, 2022
@cellio So on the fediverse you rather accept sexism and look for sexistic server for the person than speaking up for the person that just got discriminated?
Show threadMonica CellioNov 9, 2022

@TiiaAurora I'm not sure how you got that from what I wrote. I thought you were talking about less tech-savvy folks, like those who didn't grow up with the Internet or aren't in tech fields. Techies can be harsh on such folks (e.g. Stack Overflow), and I was saying that instead of piling on or ignoring, we should help folks find their way.

We shouldn't condone rudeness of course! Sometimes it's not "rude" but "mismatched expectations". If that's not what you were talking about, sorry.

Show threadTiiaAurora 🌚Nov 9, 2022

@cellio
I was talking about very aggressive mansplaining because it was assumed the person is not tech savvy because of demographics.

My message meant that 1. thats not okay and 2. even if someone is not tech savvy then there is a time and place to "help" but derailing conversations because of saying "mastodon" instead of "fediverse" while the topic is a more serious one, is kinda meh.

Show threadMonica CellioNov 9, 2022

@TiiaAurora it looks like I saw part of your thread out of context, then. Mansplaining isn't ok. Aggressive condescension isn't ok no matter what form it takes. And derailing a conversation over a minor point isn't productive; there are ways to provide info without doing that, if you can't let it go.

I don't think we disagree.

Show threadHolobrineNov 9, 2022
@cellio @TiiaAurora What is this, a healthy dialog between respectful adults? What kind of Twitter clone is this? 😜