The phone rings.
You pick up and,
'Hello?'
Silence on the line for a few seconds.
Used to such chicanery
you almost hang up. Instead, you listen.
'Would you like to die? We're happy to help.'
You consider this and return with, 'Does the afterlife have WiFi?'
'No, not yet, though we're working on it.'
You sigh quietly because you know the speed of bureaucracy and rejoin with, 'You will call me back when you do. Until WiFi is available, I shall not pass. Thank you!'
You hang up decisively.