John Mastodon 
Consider this account of my life's suffering:
John Mastodon was tripping out in China. An old man wondered "What is the Buddha-nature?" John whispered: "Bibble."
Heed the words of #JohnMastodon.
A tiki tramp gave me this cocktail recipe on the streets of Hawaii. He said it was called the New Windsor Skin Rearranger.
Half-fill a cocktail shaker with ice. Into this pour the juice of 2 oranges. Add 2 measures of strychnine. Top up with orangeade. Shake incompetently for 13 minutes, then strain into a chipped mug. Slàinte mhath!
Ignore the words of #JohnMastodon at your peril.
I wrote this haiku after meditating in my Zen garden:
Outside the jackboot
Becoming ever stronger
The spotty mother
These are the words of #JohnMastodon.
In John Mastodon's house are many mansions, and you are welcome in them all. Consider this.
John Mastodon was pogoing in Norway. An old woman mused "How am I to comprehend Mastodon?" John replied: "It is me, John Mastodon."
#JohnMastodon has cast those pearls before you. Do with them what you will.
John MastodonTouchè, Monsieur le douche! #COTUS #clown #fucktrump
France tells US NATO serves Euro-Atlantic security, not Hormuz offensive missions
https://www.reuters.com/world/europe/france-tells-us-nato-serves-euro-atlantic-security-not-hormuz-offensive-missions-2026-04-01/
Study these words carefully:
The grubby barmaid discarded her shoes in the new Commodore factory at Corby.
Ignore the words of #JohnMastodon at your peril.
And the list keeps growing! #fucktrump
Neutral Switzerland denies airspace for US military flights to Iran
https://www.swissinfo.ch/eng/neutrality/several-us-overflight-requests-rejected-by-the-federal-government/91192596?utm_source=multiple&utm_medium=website&utm_campaign=news_en&utm_content=o&utm_term=wpblock_highlighted-compact-news-carousel
The bot from the social network: PROBE YOU'RE NOT A ROBOT!
Study these words carefully:
Dame Janet Baker discarded her spectacles in the swimming pool.
Ignore the words of #JohnMastodon at your peril.
But, but, he said it will remain opened in the begining. Is the clown heartbrokened because nobody outside his country listened to him? Is his diaper dirty? #COTUS #fucktrump
Trump admin believes it will have to end Iran war with Strait of Hormuz still closed
https://www.cnn.com/2026/03/31/politics/strait-of-hormuz-open-trump?cid=ios_app
Trump officials acknowledge they can’t promise to reopen Strait of Hormuz before ending Iran war
President Donald Trump and his administration increasingly believe that they can’t promise to reopen the Strait of Hormuz as a prerequisite to declaring “mission accomplished” in the war with Iran, sources familiar with the discussions tell CNN.