Fesshole🧻 / @fessholeWhen I spilt up with my absolute cock of an ex, he really dragged his heels moving his shit out. He'd spent years restoring an old MG which was taking up space in my garage. So I took the inside of the drivers door off and put a marble in there to roll around.
I "accidentally" mute people on MS teams when they annoy me. Can't do it too often otherwise people will know.
Almost everything my significant other has suggested I throw away is in a box in the garage. Sure, my old T-shirts might seem a bit ratty now, but come a few years after World War Three they'll probably be the nicest clothes we own
Once I was working on a poster for a mouthwash brands, featuring many splashes inside the mouth. I was adding splashes to 3D rendering and I've photoshopped lots of human sperm instead of water splashes. Billboards were everywhere.
𝓐𝓷𝓭𝔂I was raised Anglican and went to church growing up especially while my dad was still around but as I got older things shifted cos I noticed the homophobic vibes and started questioning yet I remain true to myself, gay and still an Anglican Christian. This is between me and Him ✝️ #confession
I'm in my 60s and still have a full head of dark healthy hair. I get many compliments, it makes me look younger, and I get serious hair envy from my male peers. But the truth is, I'd rather be grey as I reckon I look like a nonce who's trying too hard.
Was going to fix the noisy exhaust on my wife's car, but given it just woke me from a nap and gave me time to look busy when she came home, maybe I won't bother.
When I am heading upstairs for a wank, I say to myself, "I'm going to masterbate, masterbate, masterbate" in the style of Ted Striker's "I've got to concentrate..." in Airplane. Now you will too.
I'm a girl who is partial to a bit of rimming but not with a new boyfriend who exclaims mid-sex "I want to lick your turd cutter." He had to go.
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