I was cleaning under the couch and found Pica's collection of hair ties and bottle caps. The first problem is she says I can't have the hair ties back? Is that fair?

But also there were some pretty fancy looking sapphires and a tiara in the pile? Pica says all cats have a tiara because "cats are royal"

But, I'm concerned about how she got these items. I don't think they are glass, they are very heavy. Thoughts? #catcrime #picacrime #picathecat #catsofmastodon

I am exposing Pica‘s dark secret. Many people think because she has big eyes and a small button nose she also has a “cute little mouth.” This is a lie. Pica‘s mouth goes all the way back to the corners of her head, practically to her ears and she can hinge her head open like a hamburger.

and given the chance she will!

#PicaTheCat #catsofmastodon #picaExposed #catCrime #secrets #whistleblower

Someone has broken my box, so it is not as comfy as it was. I present the evidence for public judgement. Impact assessment: there is nowhere for me to sleep and I am upset.

I have already complained to the management. #Crime #CatsOfMastodon #CatCrime #cat #Cats #fedicats

In today's episode of #CatCrime we feature Fizbit, who has learned how to sabotage the spray bottle by rubbing her face on the tip enough that it unscrews and becomes harmless...

#Cats