Dear Friends of #Death,
This morning I was almost run over by a reversing unlicensed #hearse. Hope it was not a rascist driver as may have got this guy who was also crossing behind it.
Maybe he was a coroner.
In the UK anyone can set themself up as a '#Funeral Director'. They must be doing well the car is a Mercedes. The punk band I managed for a short while had a second hand hearse. Seem to remember it did 6-9 MPG
Maybe they were just looking for a bit of extra #Sunday business. Mowing down ye olde fogeys like me? Nah I am just being alarmist. Very well dressed driver white shirt black tie. They could have been a neo-punk band on their way to a gig rehearsal I suppose...
I am hoping for an uber funeral. Really must get my cardboard #coffin sorted. Somewhere to sleep during the day. Also need to contact the council about whether they collect and recycle #carcasses...
Our garden is quite small. Would vertical burial be acceptable to the council? I would probably need a death certificate. I wonder if they do one for the almost dead. A sort of pre-death certificate?
Just doing my bit for soil improvement.
https://coffincompany.co.uk/cardboard-coffin
🙏🏿 
