When Bloggers Vanish: Online Friendships, Goodbyes and Silence
How missed would I be if suddenly, without warning, I disappeared from the blogging world?
This was the question I asked myself after reading the opening line of a post that asked, ‘Did you miss me last week?’
The Sudden Silence
The blogger had been missing for a week. I don’t know how often she publishes blog posts, as I have never followed her blog, but that opening question had me wondering and made me think about bloggers who disappear without any trace.
I soon realised there were bloggers and readers I hadn’t seen for a while. But how concerned should I be about them? I guess it depends on when they last published a post, when I last had a comment from them, or when I saw a comment from them on another blog. Does being away for one week mean a blogger thinks people out there will have missed them? How long should a blogger go missing without warning before worrying about them?
I guess we would know if any of our regular readers went missing. I’m talking here about those who engage with us regularly. But not commenting on one post shouldn’t concern us, should it? How many missed comments would it take for us to become concerned about another blogger?
“In blogging, absence doesn’t always come with explanation.”
Why Do Bloggers Vanish?
There are many reasons a blogger might vanish. These include –
- Blogging burnout
- Health or personal struggles
- Loss of interest
- Privacy concerns
- Life simply moving on
Thankfully, most bloggers who leave the blogging world write a farewell post, but many disappear without warning. There could be a family emergency, an illness, or other reasons. Some come back with an apology for being away, although, in my view, an apology isn’t necessary, especially when they’ve been absent due to an emergency.
The Goodbye We Never Got
Sometimes the hardest goodbyes are the ones that were never said. Some bloggers disappear from our lives without warning, often leaving us with no way to contact them. When that happens, I believe it’s only right to leave them alone rather than try to find them. The lack of closure can be difficult, but they cut off contact for a reason, probably something they didn’t want to discuss.
If you are thinking about ending your blog, do consider that silence can feel very different from writing a farewell post. There seems to be a human need for endings, although I have always believed there is no such thing as an ending; it’s just the point where we leave the story.
“Blogging may happen on screens, but the friendships it creates leave very real footprints — even when the trail suddenly stops.”
Still Here, Still Reading?
I’ve been blogging on WordPress for over 12 years, and although I no longer follow many of the blogs I used to, I appreciate that they are still there when I see those bloggers on social media and in the comment sections of the blogs I follow.
If someone goes missing and it’s someone you have grown a friendship with, I encourage you to check in on them if they are still on social media or you have their email address. But if they have cut all communication, they’ve done so for a reason.
While some online friendships can be fleeting, I’ve witnessed countless genuine friendships form through blogging. Those friendships can grow into something special, so don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for help if life gets tough. Remember that not all friendships are measured in miles – some are measured in comments and discussion.
“Is it better to search for answers, or to simply appreciate the time we shared?”
What do you think? Have you ever seen a blogger quietly disappear from your online world? Did you try to reach out, or did you respect the silence? Should we try to reconnect when someone disappears, or accept that some chapters are meant to close without a final page? I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences in the comments. How do you handle goodbyes in the blogging world? How long do you think it would take your readers to miss you?
As always, I appreciate hearing your thoughts.
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