If #RTE hire me, I'll Fine Gael the airwaves until the people of Blackrock Dublin, Cork, Galway, and even Louth march out onto the streets and restore their VR letterboxes to their original colour, singing Vivat! Vivat!

#Tubridy #Vivat #VictoriaRegina #jobfairy

If you select me, I promise to bore the shit out of Gen Z by talking ad nauseum about Kennedy's visit to Ireland in 1963 and The Beatles.

#rte #jobfairy #Tubridy

Another important prerequisite for candidates is a cassette recording demonstrating how quickly you can begin a sentence with Sinn Fein and marry it to IRA.

#rte #jobfairy #Tubridy

Perhaps photos of the candidate in a suit sustaining a low squatting position beside a #renault exhaust pipe, ready to inhale the emissions that will shape their every spoken word on the national broadcaster?

#rte #Tubridy