John Mastodon 
Please consider these lines from my diary:
John Mastodon was tripping out in a Zen temple. A small boy demanded "How am I to understand God?" John responded: "Zeeyaajaa, daadoogaa!"
These are the words of #JohnMastodon.
John MastodonThe real question is what the hell is 19.3% of Swedes thinking?
Tesla Sales Plummet 80.7% in Sweden
https://www.newsweek.com/tesla-sales-plummet-elon-musk-sweden-2067108
Here's something I like to make in my tiki lounge. I call it the Haddington Soul Wangler.
Take an empty cocktail shaker. Into this pour the juice of 3 grapes. Add 5 measures of moonshine, 3 measures of vodka and 3 measures of brandy. Top up with sparkling water. Shake suggestively for 14 minutes, then strain into a champagne flute. Yeghes da!
I am #JohnMastodon, and I will always be your friend.
Are you sitting comfortably? Then I will begin.
John Mastodon was meditating in Algeria. A small boy inquired "How am I to comprehend a pumpkin?" John whispered: "It is everything."
Heed the words of #JohnMastodon.
This cocktail of mine will blow your mind. I call it the Henrietta Duodenum Fucker.
Take an empty cocktail shaker. Into this pour the juice of 2 limes. Add 2 measures of brandy and 5 measures of lighter fluid. Top up with Pepsi Cola. Shake suggestively for 16 minutes, then strain into a chipped mug. Zum Wohl!
Be grateful, for #JohnMastodon has spoken to you.
This story has a message that will help you to deal with today's events:
John Mastodon was walking in the countryside. A disciple questioned "What is the Buddha-nature?" John whispered: "You will find the answer in your heart."
Ignore the words of #JohnMastodon at your peril.
Here's something I like to make in my tiki lounge. I call it the East Quogue Vision Jolter.
Half-fill a cocktail shaker with ice. Into this pour the juice of 3 cucumbers. Add 4 measures of mezcal, 2 measures of dark rum and 4 measures of cognac. Top up with orangeade. Shake madly for 3 minutes, then strain into a chipped mug. Bottoms up!
These are the words of #JohnMastodon.
This story might help you in your journey through life:
John Mastodon was tripping out in Silverthorne. A small boy mused "What is the nature of human existence?" John replied: "The answer is inside."
This is #JohnMastodon, signing out.
Study these words carefully:
The halfwitted policewoman removed her hat.
Ignore the words of #JohnMastodon at your peril.
I'll say it again. Israel needs a round of sanctions in order to force its compliance with international law!