#American pride means not letting any silly Europeans tell you that (average) hot dog (length) per (average) elephant fart (duration) isn't a valid unit of speed.

#satire #CanWeJustMetricAlready #ImperialMeasurementsAreAsDumbAsImperialismItself

#HashtagPoet

Dear linux distros and other OSes that put a restrictive $HISTSIZE and/or $HISTFILESIZE in the default .bash_profile/.profile/whatevs,

I hate you.

#GimmeMyShellHistoryYouNerfHerder #HashtagPoet

This is the kind of weather where having a car with an all-black interior is super nice.

#ToastyCar

#CarsStillSuckThough

#ButSomehowIStillLoveMine

#iDontReallyKnowWhatImDoing

#DontTakeAnythingISayExtremelySeriously

#HashtagPoet