Even AIs are being nice to me. Humans threaten me and harass me for being honest about the methods I use to code. It's hard for me to learn Git Forge software.

#coding #mentalhealth #harassment #learning #tech #community #toxicity #vibe #development #cyberbullying #gatekeeping #support #awareness #intimidation #education #developer #toxic #culture

A 17-year-old was mocked for calling an $80 purse a ‘luxury.’ Her response was pure class.

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://www.upworthy.com/80-dollar-luxury-purse-response-ex1/

The Internet Removed the Walls—and Let the Bullies In

By Cliff Potts
Editor-in-Chief, WPS News

For most of human history, cruelty had limits.

Bullies were local. Harassment required proximity. Social pressure, physical distance, and community norms acted as buffers. If someone wanted to torment you, they had to show up—at school, at work, in the neighborhood. And even then, there were consequences. Witnesses. Authority figures. The possibility of being confronted face-to-face.

The Internet dismantled those buffers.

Today, anyone can reach anyone, anywhere, at any time—inside their own home, on the device they keep by their bed. The world no longer stops at the front door. The Internet lets people into private spaces they would never be allowed to enter physically, and it does so with almost no meaningful restraint.

This is not a side effect. It is a structural outcome.

When Home Is No Longer a Refuge

Cyberbullying and online harassment are often described as “virtual” problems, as if they exist separately from real life. They do not. They are psychological invasions that occur in the most intimate spaces people have: bedrooms, living rooms, kitchens—places once associated with safety.

Unlike traditional bullying, online harassment does not end when the school day ends or the office closes. It follows people home. It waits in inboxes. It arrives through notifications at midnight. It can be anonymous, relentless, and public all at once.

The result is a form of pressure that is difficult to escape and impossible to ignore.

A Global Problem, Not a Personal One

This is not a niche issue affecting a small subset of people. It is global, widespread, and well-documented.

International surveys consistently show that between one-fifth and one-third of adolescents worldwide have experienced cyberbullying. In some countries, the numbers are significantly higher. In the United States, nearly 60% of teenagers report being cyberbullied at least once. Similar patterns appear across Europe, India, Australia, and parts of Asia.

Adults are not immune. Large-scale studies show that roughly 40% of adults have experienced some form of online harassment. Women, journalists, marginalized groups, and public-facing workers are targeted disproportionately, but no demographic is spared. Online abuse affects students, professionals, parents, retirees—ordinary people living ordinary lives.

The common denominator is access.

The Psychological Damage Is Real

The effects of sustained online harassment are not abstract.

Victims report significantly higher rates of depression, anxiety, sleep disorders, panic attacks, and stress-related physical symptoms. Among young people, cyberbullying is associated with academic decline, social withdrawal, and feelings of isolation. For adults, it can lead to job loss, reputational damage, and long-term psychological distress.

In extreme cases, it contributes to self-harm and suicide.

This must be stated carefully and responsibly: online harassment does not “cause” suicide on its own. But overwhelming evidence shows that persistent, targeted harassment significantly increases risk, especially when combined with isolation, mental health struggles, or public humiliation.

Numerous deaths—among teenagers, celebrities, and private citizens—have been directly linked to online abuse, defamation campaigns, or digital mobbing. These are not isolated tragedies. They are warning signs.

From Harassment to Crime

The escalation path is well established.

What begins as insults can become threats.
Threats become stalking.
Stalking becomes doxxing.
Doxxing becomes swatting.

Swatting—making false emergency reports to send armed police to someone’s home—has resulted in real deaths. This is the Internet translating harassment directly into physical danger, turning online hostility into lethal outcomes.

This is what happens when barriers are removed and no friction is added back in.

This Is Not Accidental

If this level of harm were truly unintended, platforms would have redesigned themselves decades ago.

They did not.

Instead, the systems that govern online interaction are optimized for engagement—measured in clicks, time-on-platform, reactions, and shares. Outrage, conflict, and hostility reliably increase all of those metrics.

That is not speculation. It is settled behavioral science.

Platforms know that:

• Conflict spreads faster than calm.
• Anger drives interaction.
• Pile-ons keep people watching.
• Harassment increases engagement.

And so hostility remains cheap, easy, and scalable.

Moderation exists, but it is reactive, uneven, and often symbolic. Reporting systems are slow. Enforcement is inconsistent. Abusers are frequently allowed to return under new accounts. Victims are told to block, mute, or “log off,” shifting responsibility away from the system that enabled the abuse.

When harm persists at scale despite decades of awareness, it stops being a side effect. It becomes a feature.

The Moral Inversion

Perhaps the most damaging part of this ecosystem is how responsibility is framed.

Victims are asked why they engaged, why they posted, why they didn’t leave. The system subtly implies that being targeted is a consequence of participation—that exposure is the price of connection.

This is a moral inversion.

No one deserves harassment for existing online. No one consents to abuse by using a communication tool that has become mandatory for modern life. And no one should be forced to choose between isolation and exposure to cruelty.

Why This Matters Now

The Internet has been around long enough that we can no longer pretend this is growing pains.

The evidence is in. The outcomes are measurable. The casualties are real.

Allowing the entire world into private spaces without safeguards has consequences. When anyone can reach anyone at any time, bad actors will exploit that access—especially when systems reward them for doing so.

If platforms truly valued safety over growth, they would introduce friction. They would slow virality. They would limit anonymity where it causes harm. They would absorb responsibility instead of deflecting it.

They have chosen not to.

Accountability Starts With Honesty

This is not about nostalgia for a pre-internet past. It is about acknowledging what has been lost in the transition.

Walls existed for a reason. Distance mattered. Privacy mattered. Social limits mattered.

The Internet removed those walls and failed to replace them with anything meaningful. In doing so, it normalized cruelty, scaled harassment, and invited people into homes where they were never welcome.

Until that is confronted honestly—without euphemism or denial—the damage will continue.

Not because people are weak.

But because the system allows it.

Image-Based Sexual Abuse: Why Stranger Danger Misses the Real Risk

Challenging the “Stranger Danger” Archetype

For decades, the public’s conceptualization of “child pornography” was tethered to a specific, mid-90s archetype: a predatory adult in a basement, wielding a camera to exploit a child. This “stranger danger” narrative shaped the first generation of digital safety laws, but it relied on a technological bottleneck that no longer exists. In the early digital era, creating and distributing such material often required “intermediaries,” developers or specialized services, who acted as a friction point for reporting abuse. Today, that barrier has vanished. A landmark 2026 study published in Sexual Abuse reveals a landscape that has shifted from adult-captured content to Image-Based Sexual Abuse (IBSA). A broader term encompassing the non-consensual making, distribution, and threatened distribution of sexual images.

The data is clear: the primary producers of modern abusive content are not “strangers,” but the youth victims themselves and their immediate social circles.

A Massive Shift in Content Creation

The study provides a staggering clarification of the digital landscape: the vast majority (86%) of abusive episodes involved images produced by youth. Either by the victims themselves (73.7%) or by peer perpetrators (12.1%).

In stark contrast, images actually produced by adults accounted for less than 8% of the total episodes. 

The velocity of this shift is remarkable.

Are you an LPC in need of continuing education? Dr. Weeks has a course on this material and many other unique and interesting topics.

In the course, “The Prevalence of Youth-Produced Image-Based Sexual Abuse,” Dr. Weeks teaches how child digital safety is undergoing a paradigm shift, how changes in Image Based Sexual Abuse require adaptation, and proposes a framework for conceptualizing IBSA.

In 2010, youth-produced images accounted for roughly 40% of law enforcement databases; that figure has more than doubled in just over a decade.

This reflects a fundamental change in adolescent socialization where digital media is fully integrated. The “democratization” of recording devices means the power of production has moved into the hands of the adolescents, often within contexts of dating, flirtation, or peer pressure, removing the traditional predatory intermediary entirely. 

“This shift in terminology [from child pornography to CSAM/CSAI] was intended to emphasize that the images were often made by in-person sexual abusers, who recorded their abusive conduct… The new conception also acknowledged the ongoing harm to the children depicted, as these shareable images can be characterized as ongoing abusive provocations and reminders.”

Why the Stranger Myth is Dangerous

The persistent fear of the “online stranger” creates a dangerous blind spot.

The study findings reveal that only 3.4% of youth perpetrators were “not known in-person.”

Mathematically, for youth-on-youth abuse, the “predatory stranger” is almost a statistical anomaly. Even among adult perpetrators, 59% were offline acquaintances like dating partners or friends. 

While 36.7% of perpetrators’ identities remained “unknown” to the victims, a significant data gap that complicates reporting, the known data points to a reality where the threat is an in-person peer or partner.

Perpetrator Relationship Breakdown

The Victim as the Producer: A New Tool for Adult Abusers

Perhaps the most counter-intuitive finding is the role of the victim in adult-perpetrated abuse.

In 75% of adult-perpetrated episodes, the images were originally produced by the youth victim. Modern adult abusers rarely need to capture images themselves; they leverage unequal power dynamics to manipulate “normal developing interests in sex” into digital assets. 

Adult “Groomers” and “Coercers” no longer require physical proximity to generate material.

By leveraging romantic pretense or blackmail, they turn the victim’s own device into an instrument of exploitation. This evolution demonstrates how predators have adapted to a world where self-production is the social norm, weaponizing the victim’s own agency against them.

Are you exploring your trauma? Do you feel your childhood experiences were detrimental to your current mental or physical health? Utilize this free, validated, self-report questionnaire to find out.

Take the Adverse Childhood Experience (ACE) Questionnaire

The Five-Category Framework for Abuse

To address the complexity of modern IBSA, the study proposes a five-category framework that moves beyond binary labels to define the specific intent and dynamics of the abuse: 

The Prevention Paradox: Why Punishment Might Backfire

The study highlights a critical “prevention paradox”: an over-reliance on harsh criminal sanctions for youth may actually decrease safety.

When the legal system treats peer-to-peer “betrayals” with the same punitive weight as adult predation, victims become reluctant to report. They fear that reporting a peer, or admitting to self-production, will result in themselves or their friends being permanently labeled as sex offenders. To counter this, we must move toward restorative justice and rehabilitation models.

Effective prevention requires providing technical resources for image removal and focusing on the nuances of digital boundaries rather than simple prohibition. 

“Warnings simply to not talk to strangers, not to share information and not to make sexual images are insufficient. These do not address the complexity of the situations many youth face or the context for these offenses, which include romance, bullying, and normal developing interests in sex.”

Learn why it’s important for everyone, especially teens, to be able to control their online experiences. Dick Pic Culture: How do Teenage Girls Navigate it?

Redefining Digital Consent

The epidemiology of digital abuse has fundamentally changed.

We are no longer defending against a shadow in a dark room. We are navigating a landscape of peers, partners, and self-captured content.

This necessitates a move toward a “consent standard” rather than a “prohibition model.” Protecting youth today requires multidisciplinary agencies, like Children’s Advocacy Centers, that offer supportive, trauma-informed interventions rather than purely punitive ones.

The Final Thought

If the statistical “threat” is more likely to be a known peer or a manipulated self-capture than an online stranger, are our safety conversations still stuck in the 90s?

We must adapt our education to a reality where the greatest risk to a child is often found in their own contact list. What are your thoughts on this?

Are you a professional looking to stay up-to-date with the latest information on, sex addiction, trauma, and mental health news and research? Or maybe you’re looking for continuing education courses? Then you should stay up-to-date with all of Dr. Jen’s work through her practice’s newsletter!

Are you looking for more reputable, data-backed information on sexual addiction? The Mitigation Aide Research Archive is an excellent source for executive summaries of research studies.

Do you feel your sexual behavior, or that of someone you love, is out of control? Consult with a professional.

I contributed three weeks of real technical knowledge to a Sabahan dev group. When I responded to an MA63 post, I was called "mentally ill" and mocked with stickers while saying I was in distress. The admin pinned a topic reminder. Everyone who bullied me stayed. I was removed. This is the record.

https://kalvin.obulou.org/what-ha

#cyberbullying #mentalhealth #Malaysia #Sabah #MA63 #humanrights #tech #justice #accountability #community #disability #neurodivergent #lateralviolence #awareness #truth

I am grateful that I survived character assassinations made by lemmy.world and wizard.casa. I am still alive despite my overwhelming moments. They are not there to bring justice; they are managing risks to their survival by attacking my character and exploiting me. I know who the admin is, and who they are. They take for granted my effort in making things right. They think they can make me forget.

Edit: Still, lemmy.world did not return my data despite my explicit request to them, and they blamed their nature, stating that they are unpaid and minimising the seriousness by returning my data after approximately 28 days. However, I did not accept this because they violated the set deadline of 3 days.

Edit 2: Also, one user was also harassing me through DMs when I was being vulnerable. The Fediverse instance is gotosocial.social. For them, perhaps the harassment is cool, harmless, and democratic—until someone does the same to them, at which point they might label it as trolling.

#fediverse #mentalhealth #onlinecommunities #dignity #trauma #survival #selfawareness #reflection #internet #humanity #harassment #healing #identity #justice #resilience #fediverse #lemmy #mastodon #onlinecommunities #mentalhealth #trauma #healing #resilience #survival #selfawareness #reflection #humanity #dignity #identity #justice #harassment #cyberbullying #internet #socialmedia #decentralization #selfhosting #psychology #wellbeing #recovery #emotions #discussion #ethics #community #voice #truth #growth #neurodiversity #support #accountability #online

The Cowardice of the Digital Mask

Got trolled and bullied? Take a look at their profile. Anonymous pseudonyms and no real PFPs. They don't even own their words, and behaviour suggests they intend to harm without accountability.

#cyberbullying #accountability #digitalethics #onlinesafety #mentalhealth #integrity #web #socialmedia #awareness #humanity #boundaries #respect #tech #community

The European Parliament backs the campaign introducing Coco’s Law.

Parliament has formally backed a campaign to introduce the Irish anti-cyber bullying ‘Coco’s Law’ across the EU.

Coco’s Law was introduced in Ireland in 2020 in response to the tragic death by suicide of 21-year-old Nicole ‘Coco’ Fox in 2018 after a sustained cyberbullying campaign against her.

https://mediafaro.org/article/20260430-the-european-parliament-backs-the-campaign-introducing-cocos-law?mf_channel=mastodon&action=forward

#EU #Ireland #CyberBullying #CocosLaw #Youth #Politics