I call my termite Clint because Clint eats wood.

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I threw a ball for my dog.
I know it was a bit extravagant, but it was his birthday and he looks great in a dinner jacket (tuxedo)

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I was at the bus stop this morning and an elderly lady said to me: “Isn’t it cold today?”
I said: “Yes, winter draws on”.
She replied: “Mind your own business young man!”

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At the age of 65, my grandma started walking 10 miles a day.
She’s 92 now, and we have no idea where she is.

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Why do anarchists always use teabags?
Because proper tea is theft!

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What do you call a Scotsman with one foot inside his hoose and one foot outside?
Hame-ish

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Why do anarchists always use tea bags?
Because proper tea is theft.

#jokeoftheday #dadjokes #classicjokes

Rock the Humor with 180+ Hilarious Stone Puns!

Looking for some stone-cold laughs? You've come to the best place! Get ready to rock and roll with these hilarious puns about stones that will definitely

PunnyPeak.com

Just found out that the company that produces yardsticks won’t be making them any longer.

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What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator

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