Eldest has forgotten to do a homework due for this morning and we’ve had a whole meltdown before school.

He’s in, it’ll be “okay”, and we’ll help him to avoid it again in the future, but I’m having all the flashbacks of going through the same thing. Feels real again.

#ActuallyAutistic #parenting #AutisticParent

What if this approach is seriously arse about. And we can do better.

#Hypersensitivity to and #avoidance of certain flavours & textures is part of our #sensory profile for many #ActuallyAutistic folks. As with all of our sensory issues, the ways we devise to deal with them come at a cost, socially, emotionally & physically. Being pressured to let go of strategies that have protected us can feel life threatening. Especially if we don’t understand where they’ve come from & how they’ve helped us (hard to do when our various unusual behaviours are examined in isolation from each other & each set pathologised with an unhelpful diagnosis).

In my experience, we can change the habits & routines that protect us only when (i) we feel safe & (ii) it is our choice to do so. In our own ways, at our own speed, on our own terms. This profound need for autonomy gets pathologised as ‘demand avoidance’ but it’s another manifestation of the strategies for survival that we develop & cling to for dear life. Take this from me & I will die.

How about, for kids & adults ‘with #ARFID’, we approached interventions by starting with respect for autonomy. This means learning about how this person experiences sensory pleasures & discomforts around eating & taking them seriously. Then developing options for change that can be chosen by that person, or not. At their own pace.

It worked for me. As in so many areas of my life, this is the only approach that does.

Like so many folx who grew up undiagnosed I learned to be ashamed of my struggles (in denial about them, intolerant of their manifestation in others) & embarrassed about my gifts. Wish I’d understood my #neurodivergence, & that of my family members, when I was parenting kids.

So glad we can do better now. I wish the support systems whose funding rests on adopting pathologising diagnostic categories would catch up!!

@actuallyautistic #AutisticElder #AutisticParent #disability

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2025-01-06/eating-disorder-arfid-picky-eating/104648840?utm_source=abc_news_app&utm_medium=content_shared&utm_campaign=abc_news_app&utm_content=other

Well I voted

Involved an absolutely convoluted multiple station process inside of a town hall. Plenty of chatter echoes, and random applause at first time voters. Kiddo and I were both near meltdown. Had to break out the "special needs" card for them a few times because they were unable to keep still and had to run around. Folks were accommodating once they realized what a struggle it was for us three.

I'm convinced absentee ballots should be, if not made widely available without requirement, at least legally allowed for anyone neurodivergent or anyone parenting someone neurodivergent. Without question. Should be considered accomodation. Having to follow a long snaking line and act in a certain manner is not something everyone can do.

#ActuallyAutistic #AutisticParent #ParentingAutistics #Voting #IVoted

It’s fascinating seeing neurodivergent parents talk about raising their kids. Specifically those who are aware of their neurodivergence. They’re still fundamentally the same type of people as my peers and I ,but… stronger and wiser. They’re still struggling but that’s ok. And maybe that means I can do all that they do too.

#AutisticParent #autism #adhd #neurodivergent

Last call to sign up for my autistic burnout recovery course. We start tomorrow.

http://www.autismchrysalis.com/burnout

Learn skills to get out of burnout and stay out. To create burnout-free life.

#AutisticBurnout #BurnoutRecovery #Burnout #ActuallyAutistic #AuDHD #EnergyManagement #AutisticBurnout #AutisticParent #AutisticProfessional #AutisticAdvocate #AutisticAdult #AutisticParent #AutisticMom #AutisticDad #AutisticAwareness #AutisticAcceptance #Autism #ADHD #AutisticAdults #AutisticAlly #AutisticElder

I typed out some of the most resonant parts of I Will Die on This Hill for my #AutisticParent blog, so I don't forget them.

https://willaful.blogspot.com/2024/03/i-will-die-on-this-hill-where-was-this.html

https://willaful.blogspot.com/2024/03/more-quotes-from-i-will-die-on-this-hill.html

#ActuallyAutistic #AutisticMe

Tomorrow's my #EnergyManagement for Autistics workshop. Let's talk what it really takes to get a reliable read on what your current energy levels are, and how to not overdo it. No fluff, no BS, and no shortcuts (sorry).

https://www.autismchrysalis.com/events/

#AutisticProfessional #AutisticAdult
#AutisticParent #AutisticAcceptance
#Autism #ADHD #AuDHD
#AutisticElder #ActuallyAutistic

Know an #ND teen who wants to deal with their #anxiety better and prefers learning on their own?

My next asynchronous anti-anxiety class for #neurodiverse teens starts Monday.

https://outschool.com/classes/anti-anxiety-practices-for-neurodivergent-teens-flex-class-3PvAZzW2?usid=NcunNfEM&signup=true&utm_campaign=share_activity_link

#ActuallyAutistic #AuDHD #AutismParent #AutisticParent #AutisticProfessional

(Re) #introduction

In telecom since 2002. Accumulated experience in tech support, ops, implementation, project & people management, and most recently regulatory and SOC2 compliance. Outside of work I am a human swiss-army knife of hobbies and self-education.

#ADHD and #AutisticParent. Reflexively cynical, sarcastic, pendantic, and yet also continuously striving to be kind. Results are mixed.

Liberal, married, bisexual, and firmly believe that other people's genitals are none of my business.