Well, it has been over a month since I wrote the above, yet the list keeps growing. Sometimes it's hard to realize how long this journey has been, and many important details can go missing.

This next character is quite different from the others. She is a cis female with a unique gender expression. I'm talking about Hitori Gotoh, a.k.a. Bocchi, from the anime "Bocchi the Rock!" Bocchi is a shy, introverted high school freshman who dreams of playing in a band. Despite her guitar skills, she struggles to perform in front of others and spends most of her time playing alone at home. "Bocchi the Rock" is a Moe anime, a CGDCT (Cute Girls Doing Cute Things) slice of life, which quickly became one of my all-time favorites. I connected with Bocchi and the anime, spending money on figures and manga. The anime premiered in October 2022, before I fully realized my gender identity, so I was still male-presenting at that time.

My family enjoys attending ECCC in March. We started cosplaying together in 2022, and I love it. Initially, I cosplayed male characters: a pirate and a white blood cell from "Cells at Work." However, I wanted to crossplay Bocchi. I chose the tracksuit with a skirt on top, partly because of the cold and my discomfort with skirts. I was excited but struggled to find the right clothing, especially the pink jacket due to my size. It was my first time buying women's clothing.

The event day arrived, and I wore an all-pink outfit with a pink wig and a beard for some "masculinity." On public transit, I felt nervous. At the venue, I put on the skirt, recalling my childhood happiness but feeling shy, fitting the character. The wig was troublesome, diverting my focus. Back home, I felt happy and accomplished. I decided to cosplay as Bocchi again at the next convention, without the tracksuit—just the wig, black t-shirt, loafers, and skirt.

That convention came very fast, namely Summer Con, which was at the end of June 2023. It was fairly hot, so I was glad I chose the skirt and t-shirt version of the costume. This time, I drove all the way to the venue since public transit wasn't really an option. I wore the skirt from the start but brought the pink pants "just in case."

Going into the event with the skirt felt very liberating. Again, that flashback from my childhood came, and with my previous experience with the wig, I had no issues with it this time. Yes, I was surrounded by people cosplaying, nerds, geeks, and whatnot, yet I felt very comfortable wearing the skirt and even took a photo with Ming Na Wen!

In the evening, we went back to the car, and I never thought about putting on the pants I had brought. I shared my experience with the skirt with my wife and how happy it made me. I didn't know it at the time, but I was experiencing gender euphoria.

I not only identified with this character, I became the character. It was with my therapist, during my journey to discover my true gender identity, that I narrated all the above events. My therapist gave a smirk, with a look that said, “It was so obvious, yet you did not realize.”

This is why Bocchi became one of my dearest characters and a key member of those who helped crack my egg.

#GenderEuphoria #AnimeInfluence #TransJoy #BocchiTheRock #CosplayJourney