Mastodawn

Wow, that was weird. I just had a long dream, and in it, I had an autistic meltdown. In the dream, I was forced to people a lot in a gathering-type environment, people IRL that I had no- contacted for good reason were forcing me to account for my upcoming schedule, and my phone which helps me remember things and stay functional kept crashing itself when I needed it most.

I have no idea what triggered this dream, but oh am I glad to have my safe space at home with my kitty! It's interesting how this intensity is lying in wait just outside the door.

@autistics #ActuallyAutistics #Peopling #AutisticMeltdown #Dreams

Makan Jan 22

I threw up when I took Trintellix at 4:00 AM EST this morning. I'm off the Vyvanse and Abilify. Oh, and my psychiatrist sucks. A little help here?

https://lemmygrad.ml/post/10460048

I threw up when I took Trintellix at 4:00 AM EST this morning. I'm off the Vyvanse and Abilify. Oh, and my psychiatrist sucks. A little help here? - Lemmygrad

cross-posted from: https://lemmygrad.ml/post/10459968 [https://lemmygrad.ml/post/10459968] > It is now 2:00 PM and, for the past week, I’ve been neither taking Vyvanse nor Abilify. I haven’t taken Vyvanse for two weeks, in fact. > > I felt good this morning, despite it all, and have been wondering if Vyvanse and Abilify has been negatively affecting me all this time and I just didn’t know it. > > Apparently, and correct me if I’m wrong here, you’re NOT supposed to take both Vyvanse and Abilify together; they do NOT go together. > > Can anyone provide me more information about this? > > I am researching online about this combination, but I have cyber-chondria and so have trouble researching this stuff up on my own (it’s hard to do the research when you have so much fear and what-not). > > How does Vyvanse affect you mood-wise? > > And how about Abilify? > > How about both together? > > I am Autistic with ADHD, probably OCD, and C-PTSD. I am transfem as well, but haven’t done HRT. I also have SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder). I’m 30 years old. > > My psychiatrist is a “pill-pusher” and just gives me whatever medicine I ask for or just what’s popular; I’m in Virginia and we’re known for our bad and corrupt psychiatry and mental health institutions here. > > People on Reddit keep telling me to “trust your pyschiatrist” or “talk to your psychiatrist” but my psychiatrist absolutely sucks. > > I’m trying to ask for a second opinion from other institutions and psychiatrists. > > I’m going through Abilify on Wikipedia and the results that it does on human beings seems abysmal, no offense to anyone here who might take it. > > I just heard from a friend that Abilify made her feel absolutely awful during the time that she took it and even rageful. > > It’s used most often on Autistic people and I’ve been taking it for about 10 or so years; I feel great without it. I realize that the sudden happiness comes from NOT having it at all.

Makan Jan 18

The Reason Why Autistic People Avoid Feeling Joy

https://lemmygrad.ml/post/10411531

The Reason Why Autistic People Avoid Feeling Joy - Lemmygrad

cross-posted from: https://lemmygrad.ml/post/10411489 [https://lemmygrad.ml/post/10411489] > This is kinda like me, ngl. > > Am Autistic as well. > > We also mistake joy for anxiety.

Goiterzan/Amygdalai Lama Dec 12

wow, ten minutes 😜
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Like I can stop, LOL
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Group dynamics is NT psychology, they feel they've studied it and learned it to name it, they acknowledge it's not the happiest thing for people - but just like I complained about the "construct," idea, that's the end of their inquiry, "people," have this group dynamics thing that keeps ruining the world, pity.
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It doesn't seem to occur to them to ask why it exists, where it comes from. All these unfortunate aspects of "Human Nature," don't seem to need an explanation. They are adorable when they try to do psychology, but they can't see spanking and "normal," child abuse until it reaches spectacular levels, so for them there is no apparent cause for their group conflict, it's just the way it is.
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They have a cause, abuse, with no effect they can see or acknowledge, and an effect, conflict, with no cause that they need to know about.
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There is a genetic factor, I think, but race isn't it, I think there's a gene and a neurotype sort of taking over the world, across any and all races that has spanking and patriarchy and war.
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@autistics #actuallyautistic #ActuallyAutistics #autism

Jeremy Mallin Oct 12, 2025

Any fellow Autistics on here have a good recommendation for truly seamless socks?

So far, everything I've found that is labeled "seamless" is straight up lying.

#AskingAutistics #ActuallyAutistics

Makan Sep 28, 2025

Neurodivergence & How to Avoid Living With Regrets

https://lemmygrad.ml/post/9266824

Goddess of Petty Grievances Jul 7, 2025

I found a local place for adult psychological assessment (for autism and ADHD) but they only do it for autism. I’m pretty sure thats yes for me but not really sure about ADHD. Besides I was thinking if it’s really ADHD, some meds might help. So I guess I’m back to square one with all the confusion about my neuro-state (?) #Neurospicy #adhd #ActuallyAutistics